The next morning Kelly woke up and felt awful. She thought telling him about the breast cancer was below the belt, but it was true, she wanted him to know that things had changed. Kelly needed to let go, so she started by blocking him on facebook, every time she went on she stalked him and she needed no reminders. Kelly then took his number out of her phone. She was really done. She needed to make things right with Kevin, he did not deserve what happened, maybe things would not work out with him, but he deserved better.
Kelly went for a run, came home got dressed and called Emily. Emily said she wanted details, Kelly gave her the abridged version, she said Kelly, “that’s harsh.”
Kelly quickly replied, “I know, but I don’t regret it, I need to move on Emily. Perhaps I could have held back on the cancer thing.”
“You told him.”
“I did, it was in the heat of the moment,” Kelly said regretfully.
Curiously Emily said, “so what did he say.”
“I did not let him say a thing, I just said I am fine. You think I was cruel don’t you?”
“Umm yeah Kelly, you know he loves you reguardless.”
With a sharp tone Kelly said “no he doesn’t he does not love me.”
Emily said, “let’s just agree to disagree on that one. So what are you going to do about Keven.”
“Has Brian talked to him yet?”
“No, I don’t think.”
“Want to go grab some lunch?” Kelly asked.
They met at their favorite café and plotted out how Kelly was going to make things right with Kevin.
Emily said with a skeptical look, “so do you like him, is it even worth it? I don’t get the feeling he is the one for you.”
Kelly replied with her head to the side, “good point, maybe this is a good place to part ways.” Then said with sarcasm “oh, I don’t know, I can’t wait to go to work and screw with other peoples’ lives, this sucks.”
They finished up and Kelly went over to Kevin’s he was home, she asked to come in, he said of course. She sat down and took her sunglasses off. He could tell she had been crying.
Kelly just started “I can tell you every last detail or I can tell you that its finally all over. I am sorry I lied that is not me. It was just he left me, and I could not get passed it. Alex came over last night.”
Kevin interrupted and said “what?”
“Uninvited and unannounced, but it was not a nice visit, I told him to basically stay the hell out of my life.”
Kevin drew out a long breathe and said, “Kelly I am not sure about this, I don’t think you are ready for what I want. “
With a pout Kelly said, “I want to be but you are probably right.”
Kevin said, “Kelly I could have married you.”
Turning her head so not to look directly at him Kelly said, “could have?”
He said with confidence, "I don’t want anyone’s seconds.”
“Kevin it’s not like that.”
“Then why didn’t you tell me you dated or were in love with a guy a graduated with?”
Kelly shook her head and fiddled with her hands.
Kevin put his arm around her and said, “we gave it a good shot.”,
“Kevin I tried, you are right, and honestly you deserve better, you are a great guy.”
With a smile Kevin said, “I know,” and winked.
“I am glad your self esteem is in check,” Kelly said smiling for the first time since she got there. Then she went on to say, “wow that was the easiest break up in history.”
Kevin said, “well by the looks of it you have been through the ringer.”
“No, I am just a psycho you are doing the right thing trust me,” and laughed.
They hugged and Kevin said, “I am sure I will see you around,”
Kelly simply said, “I hope so.”
Kelly called Emily and they made plans to go to happy hour that week. She went home and spent the Sunday cleaning and doing laundry. She had to work at it but over time she slowly was letting Alex go.
Alex could not fathom that she had breast cancer. He also knew she chose not to share that part of her life with him, but he loved her and needed to be sure that she was OK. Alex called Emily and said, “just tell me she is healthy that is all I want to know I know I don’t get details but I need to know she is OK.”
Emily said “Alex she is, she has had perfect mammograms for almost a year, they got it, she is OK.”
“Thank god, I know I am not part of her life, but Emily if she ever or if you ever think.”
Emily knew what he was saying and she just said, “I will Alex I promise, if anything changes I will call you.”
He said, “Thanks Emily.”
“Alex for what it’s worth I hate that things turned out this way.”
Alex’s voice cracked and he said “you and me both. Thanks Emily”
Emily never told Kelly he called, but she did not have any regrets about telling him, he loved her and he should not have to wonder if she is dying.
Alex went back to DC and saw that she did not come up on his facebook feed anymore and just shook his head. He called his Mom and filled her in. Grace said, “well you are doing the right thing, there really is nothing you can do at this point, she is hurt, your paths may cross again but maybe you need to just move on too.”
He said, “did you know she came to see my speech?”
“I thought she was coming but I did not know she came.”
Confused Alex said, “what?”
“Alex, don’t get mad but I invited her.”
“I wanted my son to be happy, and she wanted to come.”
“Mom, she said she saw me on stage but then ran off.”
“Oh Alex that is sad.”
Alex said, “she had breast cancer.”
“Oh dear, is she OK?”
Alex said, “yeah she is.”
“Well you know as well as anyone that stuff changes a person.”
With a flat tone he said, “Apparently.”
“Alex, you know how that stuff can change a person, she may not be who you use to know.”
“I cannot stand that she did not tell me and that she went through that without me, I would have been there for her Mom. “
She said, “now you think about that, when you had your accident if someone would have come back to you after you got hurt, you would not have let them for fear it was pity. That is awful Alex, she is such a sweet girl I hate to think of her going through that at her age.”
Over the coming weeks he asked his physical therapist out, she was not interested in that which was good to know. Dating was hard for Alex, Kelly was the only one that made it easy. Months passed, he worked, worked out, did some dating and found some friends. He still had her picture up; he just could not take it down. Alex was certain she burned all of her pictures of him.
Kelly really was taking a liking to San Francisco. Emily took her to all kinds of places, she had some friends and almost never sat home on a weekend. She met guys and had fun dating but she did not think they were keepers she would know when the right guy came along. Kelly sort of became a third wheel in Emily and Brian’s relationship. Brian treated her like a sister, a crazy sister but he watched out for her. Emily and Brian got engaged so Kelly and Emily had a lot of work to do. Emily asked Kelly to be her maid of honor and Kelly was thrilled to do it. She teased Emily and said she only asked her because she knew she was her only friend that could afford to throw her a proper bachelorette party.
Kelly went home for the holidays and for the first time in a long time felt like her old self. Work was great, now that she had a permanent position in San Francisco, she had more time to get things done. She did not have to travel nearly as much. Every once in a while she wished she could check up on Alex on facebook but she knew that was exactly why she blocked him. Her girlfriends came out for their annual long weekend, which was very fun, Emily fit right in and they actually got out and saw San Francisco rather than sitting in her apartment and drinking like fishes. Kristy quit fixing her up; Kelly was meeting people just fine on her own these days. Kelly was running but not like it was her sole purpose in life, more to maintain her figure than anything.
Alex, loved his job but was starting to have an itch to be in the court room, he wondered if he did not give corporate law a fair shake. He met a sweet girl named Brianna, they met through work, she was also new in DC. They dated and go to know each other, they were like good companions they kept each other company, they kissed a couple of times, but never anymore than casual kisses. They hung out a lot, went to dinner and events. It felt like he had a girl friend but really she was just a girl that was a friend.
Brianna asked about the girl in the picture once and he said, “that was a long time ago, good memories.” Brianna said, “she is pretty, you guys looked happy.” Alex said, “like I said a long time ago.” There were still pictures of her on his facebook page, deleting her from his life did not interest him, but he did what she said and left her alone. Alex went home for the holidays, enjoyed time with his family and friends. His brother came out a couple times and they did the town up like only they could. His brother asked if he ever heard from Kelly and Alex said, “oh no and I won’t.” Mike said, “that sucks she was a good girl.”
His brother thought Brianna was a dork, but that is the kind of girl Alex gravitated towards. He did not think enough of himself to go after the girls that he really liked.
Kelly ran into Kevin every once in a while as she was always with Emily and Brian and Brian and Kevin worked together. Kevin was always nice, he teased her and Kelly often wondered if given enough time they might get another chance, then one night she saw him with another girl and she realized that ship had sailed. She dated another lawyer friend of Brian’s for a while, he was actually an ass, and she told Brian never to fix her up with someone like him again. One night when he was a little drunk Brian told her that since cloning was not legal he was never going to be able to find her another Alex so she needed to make some concessions. Emily and Kelly hit him.
Kelly planned a fabulous bachelorette party in Vegas. The girls went and did Vegas up right. Kelly met a nice guy in Vegas but it was one of those what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas type things. They were very busy with the wedding, and Kelly was helping everywhere she could. Her boss had thrown a project at her that required her to go to
a few times, but she did not mind, she missed traveling a little. New York
Emily let Kelly go with her and Brian to pick the cake since Kelly had recommended the bakery. Kelly felt they needed her, as that was pretty much the most important decision. Brian asked Kelly if she was bringing anyone to the wedding and she said, probably not as she wanted to be able to do all her maid of honor stuff and just have fun. He said, “well I could see that, plus there will be single guys that you find something wrong with.” Kelly hit him. He told her she was not coming on the honeymoon that was where he drew the line. She told him to watch it or she would show up. She liked Brian a lot and was so happy for Emily.
She had her mammograms regularly and all was good, she still did not have the mastectomy but she said she would eventually. She could hardly believe it had been well over 2 years since she had breast cancer. Her mother could end any sentence in “did you schedule your mastectomy yet/”
Brian’s best man was his brother and he was married so nothing fun was going to happen there. The wedding was a few weeks away. Emily and Brian had invited Alex, they invited everyone from law school and they were not going to exclude him. But they also were not going to tell Kelly they invited him. Alex got the invitation and figured Kelly would be there but he also thought maybe not because if she was they would never have invited him. He had not been back in San Francisco in almost 2 years. He tossed around the idea of going, Nick was going, and he could take Brianna. Although he thought he would go solo so he could have nothing tying him down.
Alex called Brian and said, “so you are going to do it?”
Brian said, “seems that way. Are you going to put your ass on a plane and come out or what?”
Alex did not want to ask about Kelly as he knew that was none of his business. He did worry that she would be there with for all he knew her husband. Brian said. “come it will be great, everyone is coming it will be like a reunion.” Emily was sitting next to him when he got the call and hit him a few times, she did not think they should encourage it, it was sort of just a gesture, Kelly would not handle this well and she really had come a long way.
When they hung up Emily was like a little kid with twenty questions. She said, “is he dating?”
Brian said “it was a 5 minute conversation Emily.”
Emily went on, “did he ask about Kelly?”
Brian said bluntly, “no, he did not even hint around.”
“Well, is he coming?”
Brian said, “you know I think he may.”
“Brian you should have never encouraged him Kelly is going to freak and she is our friend hell she is like a sister.”
“I know, and if you tell anyone I ever said this I will strangle you. But just maybe enough time has passed.”
Emily said, “never.”
“Emily I don’t know, Kelly is not over him, she thinks she is and most days she probably is, but she can’t find anyone because she is looking for him. I am done talking about this. I love Kelly, she is a great girl I just want her to be happy.”
Emily told him she loved him. A few days later they got the response and Alex was coming. Brian and Emily agreed that they would not tell Kelly till right before, as she could not kill Emily on her wedding day and it would give her very little time to panic if she was going to. Emily actually thought she would handle it OK.
Kelly took Emily to an amazing spa the weekend before the wedding for a girl’s weekend. They had a very nice and relaxing time, for the first time in almost 2 years Kelly mentioned Alex’s name. She just told Emily she was glad they did not invite him. Emily said nothing as she was sure this was not going to go well, she called Brian and he said don’t tell her just wait till the day of.
The wedding reception was being held at a vineyard outside of San Francisco. Brian and Emily were both catholic so the ceremony was being held in Emily’s families church which was maybe 10 min from the vineyard. Brian’s family was big, so the rehearsal dinner seemed like a mini reception, it was at his family’s country club. It was nice, they had a lot of fun, Brian had a younger brother that was totally into Kelly. There was an 8 year age difference but Kelly liked the attention and he was cute, so she figured if anything he would entertain her at the wedding as she was going solo. Kelly wanted to be there for Emily and she did not really have anyone in mind to take.
Alex flew in the day before the wedding and stayed at Nick’s. They went to a basket ball game that night and were looking forward to seeing everyone the next day. Nick asked if he ever heard form Kelly and he said “oh no, that is water under the bridge.”
Nick said, “I wonder if she will be there.”
Alex said “I don’t think they would have invited me if she was.”
The day of the wedding Kelly got up early and went to Emily’s mom’s house where her Mom had a nice breakfast for all the bridesmaids. It was a perfect June afternoon; it could not have been better weather. The hairdressers and makeup artists came to her Mom’s house which made things simple. Emily looked stunning she had this long blonde hair, and a gorgeous veil. Kelly told her she was the prettiest bride and she was so honored to be her maid of honor. Kelly helped with whatever she could. She decided not to drink too much; she wanted to be there for Emily.
On the way to the church in the limo Emily said, “Kelly don’t freak out.”
Kelly said sounding slightly panicked, “what, you want to call it off?”
Emily said, “oh no. Kelly it’s my wedding day and you can’t get mad at me. Promise me you won’t get “Emily spit it out.”
“OK here goes, we invited Alex and he said he was coming so he may be here.”
Kelly said, “what?”
“Kel I am sorry, we did not want to tell you because I never thought he would come. How could we not invite him? I know if I had told you ahead of time you would have been a wreck.”
Kelly said, “give me some credit, but I might have brought a date.”
“Kelly I swear, I never thought he would come.”
Kelly was totally freaking out but pulled it together and hugged Emily and said. “I am not mad at you now, maybe when you get back from your honey moon but not today. I will be fine, this is your day not mine, if he is here that is fine by me.
Emily said, “wow, that is not what I expected.” Then Kelly grabbed a bottle champagne and said there goes the whole staying sober theory and they both laughed.
Kelly said, “one last question, is he coming alone?”
“That is what the response said.”
Of course Kelly was the first to walk down the aisle. She decided to hold her head high and if he was there, so what, it had been 2 freaking years. She had a couple mimosas in her so she felt a little better about things. Kelly walked down the aisle and did not see him, so she figured all was good. When she turned around and looked at how many people were there, she saw way in the back the top of his head. Kelly had forgotten with the chair he would have to be in the back. She took a deep breath and stayed on task.
Alex had an awful view, but he knew that was Kelly up there she was thinner and maybe blonder but he would know her anywhere. He really was not expecting her to be the maid of honor. They made eye contact once, but it was fleeting. The ceremony was beautiful, Kelly cried a few times, she did a reading and knew he was watching her, which made her nervous. She was doing her reading with Brian’s brother.
Kelly jumped in the limo and got a drink. They went to another site for pictures. Brian asked Kelly if she was pissed.
Kelly said, “no, this is your day, a long time has passed, this will be fine.”
He kissed her and said, “I love you like a sister little girl.”
They did pictures and Kelly was feeling pretty good. She did all the maid of honor duties. They got the reception; thankfully there was a table for the wedding party as with her luck they would have put her at his table. Kelly tried very hard not to look at him. Alex on the other hand could not keep his eyes off of her, he thought they made eye contact and liked that she did not shoot him a mean look. He had no idea what to expect, he got a couple drinks under his belt. Of course do to the traveling he was a little more spastic than usual which made him more self conscience.
Alex was at a table with people from law school. Nick said, “dude are you freaking out?”
Alex simply replied, “No what can I do.”
They had the first dance and the wedding party dance. She gave her toast and he thought her toast was beautiful; she used one of his lines from his toast at Mikes wedding. Once dinner started, Kelly had to go to the bathroom, on her way back to the wedding table she passed him. She looked at him and said, “Hi.”
Alex did the same and they both looked back and of course caught each other looking back, she stopped at the bar on the way. The reception was indoors but it had a wrap around balcony that sat up against the vineyards.
Kelly saw Kevin and went over and introduced herself to his date. Kevin gave her a hug and said, “are you here with Alex?”
“No I actually had no idea he was coming.”
Kevin said with skepticism written all over his face, “interesting.” She hit him and walked away. Kelly hung with the girls for a while. She did not eat much as she had dieted for a week for that cake. She danced a little. Alex watched her from time to time; he also caught up with his friends. He did a couple shots, and tried to loosen up. He was not going to pursue her at all; he did not want to ruin her night. Alex did however think she was there solo. Brian’s younger brother seemed into her but he knew she was not with him.
Emily and Brian were making their rounds. Alex had gone out on the balcony and was just sitting out there trying to figure out why he left San Francisco. Kelly thought she was going to do exactly what she said she never would. She felt like unless she dealt with this head on she was going to be a freak all night and she had looked forward to this night for so long. So she grabbed two pieces of cake and a bottle of champagne. Kelly slowly walked over to where he was and pulled a chair up and said, “so what is more uncomfortable, pretending we don’t see each other or me just plopping down beside you?”