I kept trying to tell myself that I didn’t see what I knew I
saw. That it was some kind of
mistake. That the girl Mason was fucking
wasn’t my therapist, the one I’d fallen in love with.
But it just made too much sense. Mason had made several comments in the past
about how he thought Jane was attractive.
And then he didn’t want to tell me if he was seeing someone or not,
which was really fucking weird. And then
the kiss, of course, which I saw with my very own eyes. They weren’t sucking face or anything, but it
was definitely a kiss between two people who were a couple. I could tell.
The next morning, I was really cranky because I hadn’t slept
well, and I knew that Jane was going to be seeing me first thing in bed. Jane: that lying whore. I couldn’t believe she was fucking my best
friend and had kept it from me. And it
didn’t make things better when I saw that Jane had brought someone with her.
“Hi, Nick,” Jane said.
“This is Greg. He’s going to be
your primary care attendant when you go home.”
Have you ever met a person and just disliked them
instantly? That was me and Greg. Granted, I was still really upset over the
situation with Jane and Mason, but I’m pretty sure I would have hated this guy
either way. He was in his late thirties,
short and solidly built with a shaved head and a cleft in his chin (Mason and I
always used to call those things “chin butts”).
He looked like he could have been a boxer. He also looked like he didn’t take a lot of
shit from people.
“Hi, Nick,” Greg said, raising his hand in greeting.
“Hi,” I mumbled.
“I’m going to spend the next week or so training Greg to do
your care,” Jane said. “So we’re going
to be seeing a lot of him.”
“Fantastic,” I said without enthusiasm.
Jane frowned at me, then continued, “I was thinking that
since you’re in bed, I could teach Greg to do your bowel program, then how to
do the Hoyer lift transfers.”
Because right after you meet someone, the first thing you
want to do is show them your bare ass.
Jane gave Greg instructions for rolling me onto my
side. Once I was on my side, I heard her
say to me, “Okay, Nick, tell Greg what to do.”
What??? “I don’t
fucking know,” I said.
Jane sighed loudly.
“Nick, we talked about this.
You’re supposed to know how to direct your care. What if Greg is out for a day and someone
else is helping you?”
“Then my mother will show them what to do,” I said.
Jane snorted. “Is
that honestly your answer? You’re going
to drag your mother in to help with your bowel program for the rest of your life?”
When she put it that way, it didn’t sound so great. I really, really didn’t want to do this, but
I felt stuck. “All right,” I said. “First, get a clean chuck and put it… under
my butt.”
I heard rustling from behind me and my body shifted as Greg was
presumably putting the chuck in place.
“Okay, what now, Nick?” he asked.
I knew I had to explain to Greg about inserting the
suppository and doing rectal stimulation, but I just couldn’t make myself do
it. “I don’t know,” I said. “Have Jane show you.”
“Nick, come on,” Jane said.
She didn’t sound pleased, but fuck her.
“I said I don’t fucking know!” I snapped.
Everyone was silent for about a minute. I thought there was a chance Jane might yell
at me, but she didn’t. Instead, she
started explaining to Greg how to do my bowel program in a clipped, efficient
voice. Maybe she had a point that I
should have been the one doing it, but I just couldn’t talk about inserting
rectal suppositories in front of my best friend’s girlfriend.
Most of the morning was spent training Greg to take care of
me. Cam came in to help as well, which
made it all the more obvious that I wasn’t speaking to Jane. And I’m guessing she knew why.
I had intended to confront Jane in the afternoon, after Greg
left, but she said she had an appointment and took off early. My guess was that she knew I was planning to
confront her and wanted to avoid it.
Although in general, that wasn’t Jane’s style.
There were no therapies in the late afternoon, so I was left
to my own devices. I went around the
rehab center, passing up an opportunity to watch Jeopardy in the patient’s
lounge. I tried to remember what I used
to do in the old days, before my injury.
I usually hung out with Mason or whatever chick I was fucking, usually
getting high. In retrospect, it seemed
like kind of a waste.
I went down to the lobby and looked out the windows. I was free to leave, but where would I
go? What would I do? I couldn’t even dress myself. Shit, I couldn’t even feed myself.
“Nick?”
I looked up and saw Mason standing by the entrance to the
hospital. He had a funny look on his
face. Guilt, probably. He knew he wasn’t supposed to be dating my
therapist.
“Hey, Mason,” I said.
“You okay?” he asked.
“Sure,” I said.
He shoved his paws deep into his jacket pockets. “I need to talk to you. You, uh, want to take a walk?”
I nodded.
We went outside and started going around the block. Mason kept his hands in his pockets and he
didn’t look at me. It wasn’t like I’d
never been pissed off at Mason before.
There had been plenty of times in the past when we’d fought about stupid
shit, but usually not for very long.
Mason, for all his exploits, was a very ethical person. He sometimes flirted with a girl I was
seeing, but he’d never done anything like make a play for one of them.
“I wasn’t totally honest with you yesterday,” Mason said,
his eyes pinned on the sidewalk.
No fucking kidding.
“Oh?”
“Yeah, the thing is…” Mason ran his hand through his
sand-colored hair. “I am seeing a girl.”
“Yeah, I know.”
Surprise registered on Mason’s face. “You do?
Did Jane tell you?”
I didn’t want to talk about the kiss I’d witnessed, so I
said, “Yeah.”
“I’m sorry,” Mason said.
“It just… happened. I meant to
wait, but…”
“Is it serious?” I
prayed he’d say no.
Mason nodded. “It
is. I, uh…”
He looked down at his size 14 sneakers. I was trying to read the expression on his
face but I couldn’t. “What is it?”
“Nick, I…” He heaved
a great breath. “I asked her to marry
me. She said yes.”
What the fuck?????????????
Jane and Mason were getting
married? How could this be
happening? I could deal with them dating
maybe, but how could they do this to me?
I knew Mason was trying to get his life on track, but this was insane.
“I know it’s sudden,” Mason said, his tone apologetic.
No shit. “I guess
you’ve been dating her for a while then.”
Behind my back.
“Yeah,” he said. “I’m
sorry I didn’t tell you. I would have,
but…”
It was pretty obvious why he didn’t tell me. First of all, we were barely speaking thanks
to Savannah. Second of all, Jane
probably knew what they were doing was unethical and asked him to keep it
quiet.
“Do you love her?” I asked him. I was trying to keep my voice steady, but it
was hard. I had a lump in my throat that
made it difficult to speak.
“I really do,” he said.
His blue eyes finally met mine.
“I love her so much, Nick. I know
you haven’t felt that way about a girl yet, but when you do, believe me, it’s
amazing.”
What a slap in the face.
I wanted to scream at him that I did
feel that way about a girl. I loved
her. And it was amazing. Until he
fucking stole her from me.
Knowing Mason, he’d probably ask me to be his best man. I’d have to sit there in front of a whole
room full of people, probably with the fucking ring in my lap because I sure as
fuck couldn’t hold it, having to smile like a moron while my best friend
married the woman I loved more than anything.
The thought made me physically ill.
Mason had an anxious look on his face, waiting for my response. Much as I hated him right now, I couldn’t
even entirely blame him. After all, he
just wanted the same thing I wanted.
Jane was wonderful. And you
couldn’t really blame her for choosing him over me. I probably wasn’t even in the running. Mason couldn’t steal something that was never
mine.
“Congratulations,” I croaked.
“Really?” Mason’s broad shoulders sagged in relief. “You’re not pissed?”
“Of course not,” I lied.
“Oh man.” Mason
rubbed his face. “I really thought you
were going to be upset with me. It means
a lot that you’re on board with this.”
We’d gone full circle around the block and I saw the
entrance of the hospital coming up. I
could tell Mason wanted to talk more, but I didn’t have it in me to keep
pretending to be happy for him and Jane.
“Listen, I have to go now,” I said.
“Oh,” Mason said. He
looked at the entrance to the hospital, then squinted at my face. “You sure you’re not pissed at me?”
“I told you I’m not,” I insisted, trying to keep the
irritation out of my voice. I did my
best to look him straight in the eyes.
“I’m not. Really.”
Mason and I said our goodbyes. By the time I got back to the elevator, I had
made up my mind. I had a plan forming in my head about how I was going to break
up Mason and Jane’s relationship. I knew
everything there was to know about Mason Lunt, both the bad and the really bad.
Mason wasn’t going to marry Jane if I had anything to do
with it. No fucking way.
Until the last two paragraphs, I almost was starting to think that Nick was starting to be more mature.
ReplyDeleteI could understand him wanting to FIGHT for the woman he loves. That's fair. May the best man win, as they say. But to tear apart Mason in order to keep him from marrying Jane seems down-right despicable. Perhaps Nick has not really changed much at all. . . .
By the way--great chapter--very well written. Thanks for a great read.
Thanks! I was worried nobody likes this chapter because I hadn't gotten any comments :(
DeleteI think Nick has matured a little, but not yet to the point where he's unwilling to do something immature to get what he wants.
As they say...all is fair in love and war :) anxiously waiting for the next chapter!
ReplyDeleteI really like Mason and Jane together. Nick, grow up and realize you aren't in love with Jane you just depend on her.
ReplyDeleteVery interesting! :) Thanks for the update.
ReplyDeleteApparently, Nick is still eight years old. While I sympathize with his predicament, I also hope Jane slaps him upside the head when he puts his plan into action...if he hasn't realized his jerkness by then.....
ReplyDeleteVery good chapter - you got me really riled!
I hope Nick will realize how stupid his plan is before he puts it in motion and ruins his last chance with Jane. I want her to have feelings for him and for him to grow up and be the man she needs. I want a happy romantic ending!! (with a sex scene with lots of details!!). But whatever you are planning, I love this story.
ReplyDeleteTina