Trish is heading back home and Shawn is staying behind with Ceci. They are nervously awaiting Jesse to come off the ventilator and Shawn is concerned about what Jesse may have to say to him.
Trish was out of his sight Shawn slowly wheeled back into the hospital and
headed for the cafeteria where he found Ceci at a table for two by the window.
She looked up from her phone when she realized the wheeling motion out of the
corner of her eyes and saw Shawn approaching the table. She had already moved
the second chair out of the way and Shawn popped a small wheelie as he arrived
at the table.
asked lowly, “Is she gone?”
just nodded and glanced at Ceci’s coffee.
inquired, “You want some coffee?”
was fine with Ceci getting the coffee for him. Balancing a coffee cup in
between his thighs wasn’t all the way easy so he waited for her at the table
until she came back with a cup for him, “Here you go cuz!”
Shawn took a careful sip from the cup.
watched him and asked lowly, “How are you holding up?”
shrugged his shoulders but didn’t say anything and Ceci asked furthermore, “Are
you doing O.K. with all of this?”
looked out the window for a moment, then at Ceci, “I am all right. I have no
choice, but all of it seems so unreal though. It is not right for Jesse to be
dealing with this. He was supposed to be healthy and working and keeping shit
together for us. I am supposed to be the only fucked up one in this family.”
and Shawn grew up together. She knew her cousin and didn’t mind a curse word
coming out of his mouth occasionally.
nodded in agreement and replied lowly, “Yeah well, shit happens I guess…”
sighed and then said more intensely looking directly at Shawn, “You know we are
here for you Shawn. We won’t leave you guys hanging, no matter what happens.”
Shawn nodded, “I know and I am very grateful for that…I couldn’t do this
without you guys.”
leaned her head sideways a bit and added, “…and you have Trish now. I for one
am very happy about that and I hope you are too.”
lost in thoughts he replied, “Yes…Trish...who would have thought?”
do you mean?”
shrugged his shoulders again, “I don’t know…I just didn’t think that a woman
would be into me again after what happened.”
seems to be very much into you…”
contemplated for a moment to tell Ceci about the devotee thing but then decided
it would stay between him and Trish because it was a special bond they shared
and something people probably wouldn’t understand. Just like he reacted very
confused and angry when he first found out, others may react the same way. He
would always protect Trish and her secret.
drank a sip from her coffee, then looked back at Shawn, “So what was this fight
about that you had with Trish? You never really told me.”
expression was serious, “And I won’t. It is between me and Trish and it is
I can respect that. I will not ask you about it anymore. I just hope you both are
looked at Ceci with dark eyes, “Trish is the best thing that has ever happened
to me. I love her.”
am very happy to hear that Shawnee, she is very lucky to have you.”
am lucky to have her.”
sighed and looked out the window, then back at Shawn, “….and Jesse is going to
make it through this and everything will be all right.”
evening around seven Scott, the night shift nurse called Shawn on his cell
phone, “Shawn, Jesse is awake if you want to come see him. He got some good
rest and is doing very good right now. Doc said they will take him off the
ventilator tomorrow morning.”
am glad to hear that. I will be right there.”
and Shawn were buzzed into the ICU once again and headed straight to Jesse’s
room. He laid unchanged, still and quiet, the machines humming around him.
walked over to the bed and greeted Jesse with a small hug, “Hey Jesse, we are
took Jesse’s hand and his eyes stayed on her alert for a moment until he heard
Shawn’s voice, “Hey bro, how are you?”
that Shawn pulled his wheelchair all the way up to the bed, it was still low
enough for him and he transferred right back on it so he could see his brother
face to face. He smiled at Jesse who had his eyes on him.
was not much they could do but just be there with Jesse.
told him, “Trish left today. She had to go back because she has to work
eyes stayed on Shawn the whole time as Shawn tried to think of things to say,
“She is still working at the senior citizen community.”
came back a little while later, walked over to the bed and hovered over Jesse
so he could see him, “Hey Jesse, are you ready for the night? Let’s make it a
good one with lots of rest and good heart beats and an amazing blood pressure…”
Scott laughed and Shawn thought he saw tiny wrinkles around Jesse’s eyes as he
was possibly trying to smile.
and Shawn stayed with Jesse until shortly after nine o’clock and eventually
said Good Night to him and headed back to the hotel.
soon as Shawn was outside the ICU he heard his phone announcing a text message
and he stopped to look at it.
was from Trish, “Hey baby! I just stopped at a gas station to get something to
drink. I am in Washington and be home in an hour or so. Hope you, Jesse and
Ceci are O.K. Love and miss you.”
typed his reply quickly and then followed Ceci to her car.
the hotel he felt strange wheeling into the room without Trish being there. The
room felt lonely instantly but he reminded himself it would only be for a few
more days hopefully. He had agreed to meet up with Ceci in the breakfast room
downstairs at eight in the morning and then head over to the hospital to catch
spent another hour getting undressed and washed up, then wheeled up to his bed
and transferred into it. He adjusted his legs on the bed and slid his body down
to lay flat. His phone was in reach on the night table as he waiting for Trish to
text or call him when she got back home.
was around ten when Shawn was aroused from sleep with his phone announcing a
had dozed off with the TV on and sleepily picked up his phone and saw the
message from Trish, “I made it home. In my apartment, very tired, will go to
sleep now to be somewhat O.K. for work tomorrow. Miss you and love you so very
would have loved to hear Trish’s voice but he opted not to call her and clicked
on the reply button, “I am glad you are home now. Miss you and love you very much
too. I fell asleep in the room with the TV on. I have to be at the hospital at nine
in the morning to talk to the doctor. I hope Jesse will come off the ventilator
tomorrow. I will keep you updated.”
would be wonderful. Maybe we can talk tomorrow morning. I have to see how busy
I will be at work.”
well, I love you, Good Night and sleep well.”
too baby, I love you.”
included a heart in her message and Shawn set his phone down on the night
table. Trish was on his mind when he fell asleep again.
shortly before nine the next morning, Ceci and Shawn arrived at the hospital
and Dr. Runkel met them outside the ICU.
After a greeting Dr. Runkel explained that Jesse was stable and they would take
him off the ventilator later that morning. They had been decreasing his oxygen
supply gradually over the last few days and so far Jesse was compensating very
good on his own.
asked, “Do you think he is going to be O.K. with his head injury?”
Runkel answered, “Well, all his neurological data has been within the normal
range and we will see when he can talk to us. I think your brother will be
fine. He really just had a very bad concussion, there was no injury to his
skull or brain but merely swelling and that has been going down. Jesse will
have to take it easy and not take on too much stimulation at the moment but I
think he will be just fine. His leg is really more a problem than his head.”
there any chance he can get transferred to a hospital at home in Washington?”
Runkel didn’t look very positive, “Not anytime soon. He is not ready to be
transported yet and it depends if his insurance would cover a transport like
didn’t like hearing those news at all, “When do you think he would be ready?”
am not sure Shawn, I am sorry. We will have to wait and see.”
looked over at Ceci who didn’t look very happy either.
lifted his body up for a split moment, then replied, “Well, I want him to be
strong enough before he gets to go back to Washington but it is difficult for
me to stay down here.”
Runkel nodded, “I know, I am sorry. I hope you can find a way.”
were silent for a moment and eventually Dr. Runkel asked, “Do you have any
other questions for me Shawn?”
not at the moment.”
well, I will be with Jesse and our team at eleven and we will get Jesse extubated.
He may not be too talkative though after that. It is better if you let him rest
for now until the extubation. You could come back around noon and probably see
remembered the procedure of extubation and it definitely had been an ordeal to
have the tubing of the ventilator removed and it hurt in the throat for days.
He wasn’t too happy about not being able to see Jesse until later but he
turned to Ceci, who was reading in a magazine, “I guess we will just hang
looked up, “We don’t have to stay here in the hospital. We could probably be
back around one and hopefully then Jesse will be O.K. We need to get away from
the hospital a bit.”
wasn’t sure if he wanted to leave, “What if something comes up with Jesse or if
there are problems with the extubation?”
took Shawn’s hand and said in a comforting tone, “Shawnee, he is O.K. You need
a little break too. Let’s get out of here. Come on!”
sighed and nodded, “I know, you’re right. Let’s get out of here.”
thereafter they were on their way over to a waterfront park by the McKenzie
found a spacious parking spot and Shawn was able to get into his wheelchair
it was still early on a Monday morning there were only a few joggers out. Paved
paths wound through the park and Ceci and Shawn strolled down to the riverfront
and looked out at the water.
asked Shawn, “Did Trish make it home last night?”
updated Ceci about Trish making it home safe and sound.
his rims next to Ceci, who kept pace with his speed. When they found a bench
Ceci sat down and Shawn parked his wheelchair next to the bench.
looked out to the water, “I don’t know how much longer I can stay down here if
they don’t let Jesse go to a hospital in Washington. I also don’t want Trish to
have to come down here really, it is too much driving and everything.”
pulled out her sunglasses, “I know, it would make things easier if he could get
transferred. I thought I can stay all week but I have to leave on Wednesday. I
forgot about a class I have on Thursday. Colby and Danny wanted to come down maybe,
but I know Danny is working up North this week and I am not sure if he can make
it. I know dad is coming down on Friday again.”
remarked lowly, “As much as it means to me you guys really don’t need to be
down here with me. I can handle it by myself and I know everyone has jobs and
responsibilities. I would totally understand if you can’t come back down and
Randy, Colby and Danny really don’t need to either. It costs too much money for
everyone to travel back and forth.”
are your finances right now?”
is all right. Jesse made good money for this project down here. I can still
live off that for a few weeks I guess. Just throwing my hopes out the window
for having anything done to the house or maybe getting a car for me. It doesn’t
matter though, I need to be here for him. I will just have to keep cursing at
the carpet in the house and rely on everyone else to drive me around. I don’t
care about this stuff, I sacrifice all that if Jesse is going to be O.K. I will
deal with whatever if I can just have Jesse healthy at home again.”
nodded and she felt bad hearing Shawn’s words. She could hear through his
words how much he needed his brother and how much he cared for him. She knew
her dad and the rest of the family would have no issues with helping them out.
In the past they had offered financial assistance to the guys but most of the
times Jesse had declined, he didn’t want any monetary help but it had also meant
that Shawn had been waiting to get a car and had been waiting to get some
things in the house modified for him. There was some unspoken tension about
these issues in the past because Jesse felt he needed to take care of
everything concerning him and Shawn which led to many hours of work on his
part, just making ends meet but keeping Shawn in the waiting for changes in his
life concerning mobility or accessibility.
depended on Jesse and it had caused fights and arguments between the two quite
often which usually always ended in Jesse throwing at Shawn that he worked so
hard for them and telling Shawn he was ungrateful and impatient.
started thinking about just overthrowing Jesse’s stubbornness and helping Shawn
out soon. He did need a car and he was bound to not only the wheelchair but
even the house with no way to go anywhere when Jesse was gone to work.
Ceci had stayed quiet Shawn looked over to her and repeated, “I mean it…you
guys don’t have to stay here with me. I can handle it.”
we will see how things will develop over the next few days.”
stayed at the waterfront for another hour, strolling along and chatting about
different things. Ceci found out about Shawn in the beginning not wanting Trish
to come and work for them and how he and Jesse got into the bad fight, in which
he broke his wrist. She was somewhat shocked that Jesse had went off on Shawn
like that but she knew as much as they loved each other, Shawn’s accident had
caused so much tension and stress between them. It was really no surprise that
Jesse had lost his temper with Shawn.
also knew that Shawn had been taking to the alcohol too much over the last
couple of months and it caused issues all the time. Randy had been talking to
Shawn, she had been talking to him about it and it somewhat had stayed a
asked him at that moment, “Are you still drinking?”
kept pushing his rims and looking at the ground in front of him, “Only that one
night, not really other than that...”
need to stay away from that stuff. You can’t drink yourself into a coma every
time something comes up or if there are issues.”
said tensely, “You don’t have to tell me…I know what I have to do.”
knew he didn’t like hearing about that and she added, “We only say this stuff
because we care about you. You have Trish now and that is a chance for you to
think about making some changes Shawn. Trish is a good woman.”
know that and yes, I want to make changes. Right now though I have to focus on
Jesse and that is all.”
knew Shawn was done with that conversation and she didn’t say anything else
Shawn and Ceci came back to the hospital around twelve thirty. When they rang
the ICU bell and stated who they were, there were buzzed right in and Jesse’s
day Nurse Samantha greeted them in the hallway of the ICU.
asked nervously, “How is Jesse?”
smiled, “He probably hates us now.”
looked at her alert and Samantha added quickly, “Well, the extubation isn’t
ever fun but he did very good. I am sure he is ready to see you and talk to you
as good as he can at the moment. He is still in pain with a sore throat and
even though we gave him medication for that it is still strenuous to talk for
him but you guys can go in and see him.”
that she let Shawn and Ceci go and added, “Let me know if you need anything.”
couldn’t wait to see Jesse now but he was also nervous at what Jesse would
possibly have to say to him.
reached the room, the curtain was draped and door was pulled closed somewhat
with only a crack just wide enough for Shawn to wheel through. The first thing
he realized was Jesse’s left hand on his chest, he wasn’t restrained anymore
and now his whole face was visible with all the tubing and straps gone.
wheeled in slowly but the soft squeaking noises of the frame of his chair and
his wheels on the linoleum floor made Jesse shift just a little bit.
approached the bed, it was somewhat high again and Shawn hated the fact for a
just a moment. He didn’t want to have to mess around with letting the bed down
to see Jesse but Ceci was quick in response and with her foot pressed on the
pedal she said softly, “I am letting the bed down.”
bed softly hummed and lowered itself, Jesse now breathing a bit quicker at the
realization of Shawn and Ceci being in his room. He still couldn’t turn his
head and even though his eyes flickered nervously he didn’t see his brother
until Shawn quickly climbed up onto the bed again and leaned over Jesse,
“Jesse, hey? It’s me…Shawn.”
face was clean shaven and his green eyes looked tired but he was alert and to
Shawn’s surprise his first stuttering and very scratchy words to him were,
“I…can…see that. My eyes…still work.”
had to laugh lowly and he was excited to hear Jesse talk that tears shot up in
his eyes. He couldn’t help when a tear actually came rolling out and he was
embarrassed for Jesse to see his tears.
wiped over his eyes quickly, “Jesse…”
felt very insecure momentarily and didn’t really know what to say.
he actually felt like crying and when some more tears came out Jesse actually
said, “It’s all…right…Shawn.”
much as Shawn wanted to say things to Jesse, all the things he had planned to
say, now he couldn’t bring any words over his lips as his emotions took over
and he could only produce tears and no words.
lifted his hand and balled it into a fist holding it out to Shawn for a knuckle
bump and Shawn gave Jesse a silent knuckle bump. Still his own throat felt like
fire as he just couldn’t speak.
saved the moment as she leaned over Jesse, “Hey love…it is so good to see you
turned his eyes from Shawn toward Ceci and smiled at her, “Ceci…Hey!”
much as Jesse felt Shawn being very emotional at the moment he knew the best
thing was to let Shawn have a moment to collect himself. It hurt him to see
Shawn feeling that way though and he wanted to be cheerful and strong for
Shawn, even though inside he felt anything but cheerful and strong but was very
scared and desperate as to what was happening to him.
stroked over Jesse’s cheek, “How are you feeling? And don’t talk if you are in
pain or whatever.”
answered lowly, swallowing in between words, “I…I’m O.K….Glad I…I am off…the
was in pain, his throat burned like it was an open wound on the inside but he
wasn’t going to let this stop him from talking. He swallowed with a pain
replied, “We are too…everything is uphill from now on.”
wasn’t going to say much more to him, she knew it was difficult for him to
assured him, “We are here for you Jesse. Everything will be fine.”
leaned down and kissed Jesse on his cheek.
was sitting quietly on the bed, watching Jesse and Ceci and feeling overwhelmed
with seeing his brother struggling to talk.
looked back at him meeting Shawn’s teary eyes and he started, “How…the hell…did
swallowed and coughed a little. Shawn had no idea what Jesse was referring to
and he looked at him questioningly.
then added with difficulties, “A tube down….your throat….for weeks….”
realized he was talking about his time on the ventilator after the accident. He
had been on it for almost three weeks until he was strong enough to breathe on
his own again.
lowly, “I don’t know. I didn’t really have a choice.”
kept his eyes on Shawn and his face was serious when he asked, “Are…you…all
still couldn’t really talk and his tears didn’t want to subside and he only weakly
shrugged his shoulders at the question. He wasn’t really all right either.
looked over at Ceci and she understood the look, “I will give you guys some
moved his eyes over to Ceci and she said, “I love you Jesse.”
managed a low, “I love you…thanks…Ceci.”
walked out and in passing she touched Shawn’s shoulder lightly.
nodded at her and when she was out of sight Jesse looked back at Shawn,
didn’t want to lie and he shook his head. Tears still rolled over his cheeks.
said lowly, the pain about seeing Shawn that way making it hard for him to stay
positive, “Shawn…hey…I need…you…to be strong…you hear.”
touched his hand to Shawn’s arm and he added, “Every…thing…will be O.K.”
that sentence Shawn had to laugh lowly again, tears streaming down his face
even more now.
barely managed, “That has been your motto forever!”
smiled weakly, “Yes, the only…way…to look…at it.”
wanted to hug Jesse, he wanted to tell him how much he loved and needed him and
how terrified he was of anything happening to him but instead he could only nod
and asked lowly, “You are not mad at me anymore?”
turned serious, “No, I was….wrong...I am….sorry.”
didn’t really care anymore about the arguments and the fights he had had with
Jesse. They both had made the wrong choice in words and actions in the past.
The only thing that mattered now was Jesse coming out of this and coming back
looked down, “I am sorry too.”
then asked lowly, “You…really…love her?”
nodded and answered lowly, “Very much.”
looked at Shawn intensely, “That’s good.”
a moment they were quiet until Shawn started lowly, telling Jesse how he found
out about the accident and that he came down with Trish and Uncle Randy
initially and in the end he informed Jesse, “Uncle Randy is talking to an attorney
listened quietly and eventually he asked lowly, “Shawn…I didn’t…fuck up…my
Spinal Cord…did I?”
shook his head and answered, “No, your right leg is in bad shape though and you
have a bad concussion, there was swelling in your brain and they had to cut
into your skull.”
are holding your head still with a cervical collar so you can’t move it and
mess up anything.”
slowly moved his hand up to his head and felt the bandage on it, “Fuck!”
eyes travelled back to Shawn. Shawn’s tears had finally subsided and he just
looked at Jesse.
asked him, “How…is…your…health?”
has been good, just issues with spasms as always.”
glanced at Shawn’s casted hand, “Still…in a…cast?”
nodded, “Yeah, actually I should be getting it off this week.”
all right. I deserved it.”
were quiet for a moment again.
took another deep breath, ”A lot…of….stuff…ha…happened the…last…couple
nodded and he also felt Jesse needed to stop talking. He took gasping breaths
and his chest was visibly rising up and down.
shouldn’t talk so much. You probably need to rest again.”
shifted on the bed, he felt slight spasms travel through his legs and adjusted his
legs in a different position. Jesse watched him closely as good as he could.
am…really…glad…you are…here. I missed…you and…your...atti...tude.”
grinned at him, “Really?”
I will stay here as long as it takes for you to be better or go home with me.”
don’t…you…want to be…where she is?”
I want to be where she is, but I need to be here with you and that is what I
will do, however long it takes.”
smiled, “You…don’t have…to pay me…back…for when…you…were at…Harborview,
not like that, I want to be here…just leave it at that Jesse.”
heard Shawn’s voice somewhat tense and stopped but held his fist out for
another knuckle bump to ease the tension. Shawn smiled at Jesse and replied the knuckle bump.
eventually came back into the room. She leaned over Jesse and talked to him a
little bit. He was getting tired though
and his words came out with more difficulties.
checked in on Jesse and all the vitals were showing regular activities.
had been a long day and Jesse seemed exhausted. Shawn stayed on the bed the
whole time, listening to Ceci, Jesse and Samantha. He just wanted to be there
with Jesse through all of it. At the same time he wished very much that Trish
could have been there with him.
eyes kept travelling over to Shawn and the two brother’s eyes would meet and
Shawn nodded reassuringly a few times.
seven Shawn announced, “We should probably head back to the hotel. You seem
eyes glanced over to Shawn, “I am…tired, but…you…don’t have…to leave yet.”
is probably better Jesse. We will be back tomorrow. You had a lot of stuff
going on today. You should get some rest now.”
when Shawn shifted to get off the bed, Jesse reached his hand to Shawn’s arm,
“Shawn…I am…glad…you are…here.”
took a couple of heavy breaths and Shawn smiled at him, “I am too. I will be
back tomorrow morning all right?”
shifted again and Jesse stopped him again, “Shawn…”
looked over at him again, “Yes?”
Trish…tell her…Hi from…me. It…was…good…seeing her…down…here. Tell her…Thank you
and tell her…I am sorry.”
was struggling taking breaths now and his blood pressure went down some on the
looked at him worried, “I will tell her. You need to take it easy now…It’s all
tried to nod a tiny nod but couldn’t really. His chest was moving up and down
quickly as he was trying to breathe but was obviously somewhat distraught.
leaned over him one more time, “Don’t worry about anything, O.K. I need you to
get out of here soon and I know Trish wants that too. We missed you Jesse and
when all this is over, everything will be good.”
nodded again but couldn’t speak anymore.
blood pressure monitor beeped and Scott came in, “What’s going on with the
then moved over to the edge of the bed, pulled his wheelchair over some and
transferred down, “We are leaving. Jesse needs to rest I guess.”
was at the monitors and then hovered over Jesse, “My man Jesse, try to relax,
O.K. Take some good breaths for me.”
leaned down over Jesse, kissed him on his cheek, “I will see you tomorrow
tried to smile but he had a hard time breathing now, his ribs hurting with
every breath he took.
was in his wheelchair and took Jesse’s hand in his one more time, “See you
tomorrow bro. Get some rest now.”
stayed behind with Jesse, keeping an eye on him and saying Good Bye to Ceci and
Shawn as they were leaving for the day.
Jesse and talking to him had been difficult for Shawn too but he didn’t want
Jesse to know. Now he wheeled silently out the door of the ICU and toward the elevator.
the elevator Shawn stared at his hands in his lap and Ceci asked lowly, “Are
you all right?”
looked up at her and with a deep breath he replied, “I am just freaking worried
about him and how everything is going to be. He can’t work anymore for a while.
His leg is fucked up and it is going to take months for him to be back to
normal if everything even works out and heals the way it should. It wasn’t
supposed to happen like that. Jesse shouldn’t have to go through this. I am so
elevator door opened on the first floor and Shawn wheeled out somewhat angry,
Ceci behind him, “Shawn wait up!”
spun his wheelchair around and Ceci looked at him with serious eyes, “It will
all be all right. Jesse can make it through this and at the end of the road he
will be back and you guys will be all right. You need to have faith that things
will work out, you hear?”
nodded, “Yeah, I know…I just hate seeing him like this.”
walked over to Shawn and leaned down to hug him, saying again, “Things will
work out Shawn and you know we are all here for you guys.”
hugged and then headed out to Ceci’s car.
the way to the hotel they stopped at a Fast Food place and ordered some food to
go. Shawn hung out at Ceci’s room for little while eating and chatting with her.
They called Uncle Randy and talked for a while. Randy had another appointment
with the attorney on Wednesday and they would discuss further process.
Police Investigation was still ongoing at the time and they were waiting for
the autopsy results of the driver’s cause of death. All this took time and
meanwhile Jesse was recovering in the hospital. There was not much they could
do in taking the next step and maybe taking this to court.
Construction had contacted Shawn the day before. Jesse’s boss Ray Carver had
known Jesse for over five years and Jesse had been one of his best employees,
reliable, flexible and hard working. Mr. Carver had told Shawn that he would
still be paying Jesse the full wages for the project. He wanted to help the
guys out and was devastated about the accident and Jesse having been seriously
hurt. All the guys in Jesse’s crew had sent their get well wishes and were
still working hard on finishing the Interstate expansion. Everyone had been
shocked by what had happened and they all missed Jesse very much.
night Shawn was in his hotel bed, propped up on the pillows with his head
leaning on the head board. It was after nine and he touched Trish’s number on
his phone and shortly after it was ringing on the other end.
answered, “Hi baby?”
are you doing? How is Jesse?”
explained to Trish how he had talked to Jesse and Trish was very relieved when
she heard what Jesse had said and that he wasn’t mad at Shawn, “I am so glad
too, he seems to be doing all right.”
the other end Trish was laying in her bed after a long day at work and still
tired from the weekend and all the things that had happened, “I miss you
hotel bed is way too big for only myself.”
baby, I know…I am planning on coming down on Friday night or Saturday.”
really hope Jesse can get transferred once he is stable enough.”
talked for a while still until at almost ten o’clock they said Good Night and
couldn’t fall asleep, too many things were running through his head and he had
not brought any sleeping pills with him. His legs were spastic under the sheet
but he tried to go without taking his Baclofen again and just riding out the
spasms for now.
about Trish and Jesse and as his eyes adjusted to the darkness he could make
out the silhouette of his TiLite next to his bed and it was almost like the
wheelchair was watching over him somehow, just a piece of aluminum and wheels
but at the same time having had such a huge impact on Shawn’s life for the past
wondered how things would have been if he would have never been in that
accident but it was hard to remember himself walking and standing. He used to
work full time in construction just like Jesse making decent money that
supported all his activities outside of work, drinking, going out, on occasion
smoking pot, switching out the girls by his side all the time and making sure
his truck ran good and would take him wherever he needed to go. It was strange
to remember how his life used to be and how it was now.
he used to feel anger and frustration though at the memories of his old life,
now he felt content and somehow like it was all meant to be this way.
stared at his wheelchair in the darkness and lowly into the room he said, “You
in his thoughts and turning on his phone once more to look at Trish’s pictures
he finally fell asleep at almost midnight.