Sunday, November 16, 2014

Three's A Crowd Chapter 15

Another day filled with situations for Trish and Shawn to deal with bringing them closer and changing their interactions with each other. The day starts out good and Trish is happy that Shawn seems to come around some and agrees to hang out with her, making them both realize that things could be good between them until the day puts them to the test once again.

Trish woke up to her alarm at eight o’clock, pushed the snooze button and turned back over, continuing her slumber. After tossing and turning and pushing snooze two more times she finally forced herself to get up. Everything was still quiet in the house. She went to the bathroom and then put some coffee on. There was no sound coming from Shawn’s bedroom or bathroom.
Mild spasms had bothered Shawn all night but he was able to manage without taking his Baclofen though his sleep had been restless. Around five in the morning the spasms had finally subsided all the way and he had fallen into a deeper sleep.

Holding a coffee mug in between her hands Trish walked over to the living room scanning the framed pictures on a shelf. In one of the photos Jesse and Shawn were sitting on the tailgate of a truck, laughing into the camera. Another picture showed them and a man on a wooden bench seemingly on the porch of a house. She realized the similarity of their features and knew it must have been their dad.
There were photos with other people and in all of them Shawn was on his legs or sitting but never in his wheelchair. All the pictures were obviously from before Shawn’s accident. Jesse smiled in all of the photos, Shawn looked more serious in most of them.
One professionally taken portrait was only of their father, he had been an attractive man and the photo must have been taken before he had the stroke. Trish was able to identify their mother in some older pictures when Shawn and Jesse were still young boys. Jesse looked a lot like his mother, she was smiling and laughing in the pictures, seemingly happy with her boys by her side.  
Trish’s eyes stayed on an apparently newer picture of Shawn sitting on a rock by a river fishing and looking around at the camera. It must have been before the accident as well because his legs looked like they filled out his jeans and they were positioned steady on the rock he was sitting on, work boots on his feet. He actually smiled into the camera. Even when Shawn was not paraplegic yet Trish would have found him to be attractive nonetheless.
She thought about how exactly the guy in that picture was right there with her in the house, they were so close but yet so far apart. She wanted him so badly but she was unsure how to get closer to him.

Back in the kitchen she poured herself some more coffee and turned on her computer to check her email and group messages. On her devotee message board she had written about her “job” as Shawn’s personal assistant and she had described him and the girls in her group were very interested in how everything was going. She had some private messages, skimmed through them and answered them.

She checked the movie schedule of the local theater, planning on maybe going to a movie later with Shawn if he was up for it. Then again she also had to finish some work for her online classes so a day at home would have been beneficial. The thought of maybe hanging out with Shawn though was a lot more appealing to her than studying. Shawn had been secluded too long and she really wanted to get to know him better outside of the house. She would have to see how he felt when he would wake up.

She ended up reading through some of her class projects and time slipped away when all the sudden she was startled by Shawn in the living room wheeling into the kitchen, “Good Morning Trish!” Trish looked up in surprise.
Shawn was only in his lounge pants, no shirt and looking like he had just woke up. Trish herself was still in her sleep clothes and glanced at her computer clock quickly.
It was already eleven thirty and she looked over at Shawn again, “Hey Shawn, Good Morning…I didn’t realize it was almost noon, I got caught up in some of my school stuff.”
He nodded and wheeled up to the table, “Yeah, I kind of slept in too…my night was a bit rough.”
“How come?”
“Just spasms.”
When Trish got up Shawn couldn’t help glance at her naked, perfect legs and he swallowed at the thought of running his hand over her soft skin.
“Are you O.K. now? Why didn’t you wake me up?”
He shrugged his shoulders, “There’s nothing you could have done about it.”
Trish picked up the coffee pot, “You want some coffee?”
Shawn shook his head.
He looked at her with dark eyes and she felt like he was checking her out, “Not yet. First I will take a shower and stuff.”
She replied nervously, “Yeah, I guess I should do that too! Do you need me to help you with anything?”
He almost had to smile a little bit because his mind had drifted off into a different world with him and Trish in it.
He shook his head quickly, “No thanks! I am good.”
It didn’t sound right at all. He did need her, he needed her more than she knew but he also knew that there would never be anything going on between them. He put his hands to his rims again, turned himself around and rolled toward the back hallway again. Looking after Shawn wheeling away Trish realized how weak her knees felt when she headed toward her own bathroom.

She was done before Shawn and sat at the kitchen table again, doing some more school work when he came wheeling up at almost one o’clock, looking very good. Dressed in jeans and a T-Shirt, sock footed in his wheelchair, his hair somewhat tamed with some gel on his head, he smiled at Trish with his dark eyes as he joined her at the kitchen table.
Trish asked him, “Are you hungry?”
“I am now.”
She got up, “Here, I will get you some coffee.”

He glanced at her computer curiously, “What are you doing on there?”
She looked from her computer to Shawn, “Just college stuff.”
“Like what kind of college stuff?”
While preparing Shawn some food she explained to him about her online classes for the Physical Therapy program and he listened attentively.
After a few moments Trish set a plate with sausages, scrambled eggs, and toast in front of him.
Shawn glanced up, “Thanks for the lunch!”
“You’re welcome! It is kind of breakfast for lunch I guess…”

Shawn started eating while she turned back to her computer and eventually he asked in between bites, “So why physical therapy?”
She was caught off guard and when she looked at him his eyes were directly on her, dark and intimidating.
She thought for a moment about her answer, “I just like helping people…I thought about nursing but kind of changed my mind that I’d rather be there for people after their surgeries, accidents or whatever, helping them adapt or rehabilitate to be able to live their lives as independent as possible.”
Shawn mentioned dryly, “Physical therapy did nothing for me.”
Trish sighed and nodded, “Well, I know you quit going, Jesse told me.”
Shawn took another bite and Trish asked seriously, “Why did you quit?”
He shrugged his shoulders, “Physical Therapy in my case was a waste of time. I mean this here…” he gestured at his legs, “…is not going away. I don’t know of any para or quad walking out of Physical Therapy on their legs.”
Trish looked down for a moment, then up at him again, “I saw leg braces in your room, what about those?”
Shawn shook his head, “Those bulky, ugly as hell things…no f…” he stopped himself from saying the F-Word, “…no way!”
Trish looked at him deeply, “I think you should give them a try…I really believe you could benefit from wearing them sometimes.”
Shawn set his fork down and leaned back in his wheelchair, “How do you think I would benefit from them?”
He was scanning her curiously and Trish stammered nervously, “Well, it helps the circulation in your legs and your muscles would get used in a way you don’t use them anymore.”
She looked down and said softly, “I could help you with it. I don’t think they are ugly…I don’t think your wheelchair is ugly either.”
Shawn had kept his eyes on her, listening and taking in her words.
When she looked up their eyes met and Shawn asked with slight sarcasm, “You don’t think so?”

She shook her head but didn’t say anything else and looked away again. He realized how she seemed nervous and he was trying to figure out why and what it was about her. Usually he was the nervous one, now it was just the opposite. He had the feeling that for some reason he had the upper hand in this conversation asking her directly about the Physical Therapy topic.
He kept on, “So you would help me with the braces then?”
She looked up quickly and he saw a kind of excitement in her eyes when she nodded slightly, “Yes, I would love to.”
He looked at her with his head tilted, “O.K. once I get my cast off and even if it is after Jesse gets back you can come out and help me with my braces then?”
Now the excitement seemed to change into fear as she stuttered, “After Jesse gets back?”
“Yeah!” He tried to read her expression, “They said I should get into the braces about three times a week and stand or walk a bit if I can. I haven’t done it at all. You can help me with them. Look at it as some practical experience for your degree. Do we have a deal?”
She smiled and said softly, “Yes, I guess we have a deal.”

Trish imagined herself helping Shawn with his braces and she couldn’t even picture it, especially with Jesse back. She really didn’t plan to still be around once Jesse got back but Shawn’s determination and very sexy smile when he had said these things made her crumble at his suggestion.

Shawn finished a bite, “What is the plan for today?”
“I don’t know…I thought we could maybe catch a movie or go to the mall or something…only if you wanted to of course. I don’t know! Just to get out again.”
To Trish’s relief Shawn didn’t say anything else anymore about the braces and replied, “I guess we could go to a movie…I haven’t been in forever…do you know what is playing?”
Trish brought up the movie schedule and they scanned through it, Shawn was leaning over some and she could smell his cologne.
After a moment they decided on “Fast and Furious” which would be playing at four in the afternoon.

At two thirty they were on the road to town. Trish seemed hesitant to push the gas pedal, she didn’t want to make Shawn mad again. He didn’t say anything to her but he was aware of her hesitation.
Eventually Trish looked over and asked carefully, “Do you want to drive again?”
Shawn kept his eyes on the road ahead, “Maybe one day…we don’t have the money for a car or truck with hand controls or having one modified for me at the moment.”

Trish nodded but didn’t say anything. At the theater Trish found a parking spot in the disabled parking area, placed the blue plaque with the wheelchair image on the mirror and got out to get Shawn’s wheelchair while he opened the door. She pushed the chair up to the car next to Shawn and stepped over to the side to give him room to transfer.

She watched him the whole time and he glanced at her for just a moment but didn’t say anything. He was busy positioning himself in his chair and lifting his feet onto the foot rest. When he was done he rolled away from the car to shut the door and Trish locked the car with her remote key. Shawn put his hands on his rims and started wheeling toward the main entrance.
Trish felt good walking beside him up to the cashier window. Just when she was going to pull out her wallet to pay for her ticket Shawn touched her hand slightly and pushed it down and their eyes met when he said with a surprised smile, “Trish, I got it!”
Trish stepped back to let him roll up to the cashier window. Shawn bought the tickets and handed them to Trish so he could put his hands on his rims again and they went in.
Inside he asked her, “You want some popcorn and a drink?”
Trish looked over at him, “Only if you are getting any?”
He nodded, “I am. Let’s get in line then!”
The line wasn’t very long and when they got up to the counter Shawn ordered their drinks and a large bucket of popcorn. Trish watched him as he paid, took the drinks, placed one of the cups in between his thighs and handed one to Trish with a smile.
She felt such utter content and happiness with the whole situation of being with Shawn.
He joked with the young girl behind the counter when he paid and Trish saw the girl’s cheeks blushing and she was smiling big at Shawn. Trish was proud to be the one with him and with every moment she felt more drawn to him.

They found the showroom and as they came inside Shawn looked around for a moment, trying to figure out the seating arrangement for Trish and him. The area right in front of the main aisle had handicapped signs all along the row of seats and open areas next to them, where one or two wheelchairs could be parked comfortably.  Shawn wheeled slowly up to one of the open spots with a comfy seat to the right of it and glanced at Trish, “Is this good for you?”
How often had Trish wished to be sitting in exactly this seat with a guy exactly like Shawn next to her. She couldn’t believe her fate and she felt the eyes of the few other afternoon movie goers on them as they seated themselves.
Shawn swiftly positioned his chair right next to the padded seat Trish sat in. She watched him put his break on and her heart was pounding quickly.
When they sat, Shawn leaned over to her and said lowly, “I haven’t been in a theater since before the accident.”
Trish gave him a wide eyed smile, “Well, I guess it’s time to change that now.”
She paused and then added softly, “I am really glad you decided to come.”
He nodded and when he looked over at her, his eyes were looking right into hers, “Me too!”
Trish smiled, “Thanks!”
“For what?”
“Coming with me to a movie and paying and all…even though you make me share the popcorn with you.”

She laughed softly and he smiled quietly and he looked so good in the dimness of the theater. Movie previews flickered across the large screen, advertisement and eventually the movie started. They stayed mostly quiet through the movie, sharing the popcorn and every once in a while their fingers touched.
Shawn joked when he kept his hand in the popcorn bucket blocking Trish’s attempt to get her fingers in and she looked at him questioningly and whispered, “Excuse me Shawn!”
He acted surprised, “What is it?”
Trish looked at his hand, softly cleared her throat and he smiled again, “Oh sorry, my hand fell asleep in there.”
Trish smiled and jokingly slapped his fingers softly.  He moved his fingers with a small laugh.
They turned their attention to the movie again. After a while Trish looked over at Shawn and was surprised to find him staring at her and when she realized he looked away quickly. During the movie Shawn shifted slightly a few times, pushing himself up a little to get some relief from sitting and Trish was so drawn to him.  

Shawn felt good and even though he had worried during the night that the spasms would bother him now he was relieved to not have experienced any spasms during the day so far. He wouldn’t have wanted to leave the house if the spasms would have stuck around. Now he felt good being out at the movie with Trish.

He glanced at her on a few occasions and he felt very lucky. She was beautiful, she was fun and he wished so much there could be more between them. There was something about the way she acted so natural around him and it seemed like his being paraplegic didn’t bother her at all. He did catch her glimpse at him a few times when she thought he didn’t know, like when he transferred from the car on the parking lot she had actually watched him and made him slightly nervous because her eyes seemed so alert on him. When he had met her eyes then she hadn’t looked away but just smiled at him. In a way it felt almost like she was checking him out but he threw that thought out quickly. When he shifted his body weight a few times during the movie he didn’t miss her glances at him either.
For a moment he was lost in thoughts, thinking about if he would ever have a girlfriend again or if he would always stay in the friend zone. He had not been in the friend zone with girls a whole lot in his life before the accident. He looked over at her and she looked at him again in exactly that moment, they smiled at each other and then focused back on the movie again.

When the movie was over they came out into the carpeted hallway and Trish threw away their trash. She walked along side Shawn who was busy dodging people coming out of the various showrooms. The theater was busier now with the evening shows about to start. Shawn disappeared into the bathroom and Trish followed his example and went to the bathroom as well.
Outside it was sunny and warm still, the sun still high for six o’clock in the evening.
Trish turned to Shawn, “Are you ready to go back home?”
Shawn looked up at her, “Actually I thought we could maybe go eat somewhere if you are hungry.”
“That sounds good, I am a little hungry for some real food. The popcorn was just a snack.”
“Me too. Let’s go eat! What do you feel like?”
Trish thought for a moment, “It doesn’t matter to me, I eat anything. How about Chinese?”
Shawn replied, “Yeah, let’s do it. Does the Chinese buffet sound good to you?”
“Yes, I love their Sushi bar.”

As they approached the car, Trish held out her key and unlocked the car. Shawn wheeled up to his side, transferred and folded his chair up so Trish could put it in the trunk. Just when Shawn had closed the car door and positioned his legs he felt his left leg tremble with his hand on it. He didn’t say anything when Trish got in but kept his hand on his leg to feel for more spasms. The trembling went on and suddenly his leg started shaking quickly. With his hand Shawn could feel his thigh bulging in a cramp under his jeans.
“Shawn, what is it?”
The spasm became more severe and travelled from his calf up into his hips, causing Shawn to tense up in his trunk, “Just some spasms.”

Shifting his body he tried to dodge the tension. He didn’t actually feel any severe pain, but he only experienced the cramping of his atrophied muscles and his legs usually acting like they had a life of their own. Moving around was difficult with spasms, they usually came in bouts of severe cramps and his body usually just surrendering to them and Shawn hoping they would quickly take their course and subside.
He held his leg down with another spasm coming on and clenched his teeth, “Shit!”
Trish suggested, “We can go home Shawn. I can cook us something at home.”
He bit his lip and his expression was tense, “No, maybe it will go away in a moment.”
“You think so?”
He forced a smile under the trembling of his body, “Not sure, but we can try to wait it out…” His voiced faded under another spasm.
Trish looked at him worried, “You still want to go to the restaurant?”
He nodded. The spasms did not subside, his right leg had started as well when they parked in front of the Chinese restaurant.
Shawn said lowly, “Maybe we can wait a moment.”
Trish nodded, “O.K. Is there anything I can do? Do you need anything out of your backpack?”
He shook his head, “I actually left my meds at home.”

This was really the declaration of their dinner plans having to be postponed and Shawn was angry at himself for having left the Baclofen tablets at home. He usually carried a vial in his back pack and left one at home but his one vial had run out and he had not refilled it.
The spasm didn’t let off and Trish could tell Shawn was trying his best to stay calm but had closed his eyes and his head laid back on the head rest of the seat. Trish saw his legs shake constantly and it seemed to go right up into his hips as he was breathing quickly, trying to control the spastic movement of his body.
He looked over at her and taking a gasping breath he said, “I am so sorry Trish! Maybe we can get something to go?”
“No, I will make us something at home…we are going home.”

She started the car and pulled out of the parking lot. She drove faster than usual, trying to get home because she knew Shawn was having a difficult time and he needed his meds. He sat with his eyes closed the whole way, breathing quickly but trying to stay calm and not panic. With the spastic activity in his hips and loins he was worried about possible reflexive urination or defecation. He had drained his bladder at the theater before they left to go eat but there could be urine in his bladder again.
He was angry at his body acting up now. The afternoon with Trish at the movie had been fun and he had enjoyed it so much. He would have liked to have dinner with her, making it an unofficial date, but all that was over now, the afternoon had ended for him and Trish was speeding down the Highway trying to get home.

Trish kept glancing over at Shawn and his face looked moist from sweat. The hand that was broke was balled into a fist and his right hand was tensely holding down his legs to keep from jumping so much.
“Almost home Shawn!”
He nodded and opened his eyes looking over at her with a sad expression, “O.K.”
By the time they arrived in the driveway, Shawn was struggling against his body. Trish hurried around to the trunk and got his wheelchair out.
She was worried somewhat on Shawn’s ability to transfer under the circumstances, “Let me help you!”
He shifted for the transfer, meeting her eyes quickly, “I got it.”

His voice was weak and he had a hard time transferring into his chair and when he glanced down at his leg he saw the dark wet spot on his jeans on the inside of his thigh.
Trish saw it at the same time and she saw the horror in Shawn’s face, “Don’t worry about it Shawn!”
He angrily hissed through his teeth, “Fuck! I was afraid that would happen.”
“No biggy, come on!”
Eventually Shawn was in his chair still eyeing his jeans, hoping it wouldn’t get worse.
He attempted to push himself up the ramp but another spasm shook his body and he stopped, waiting for the right moment to push his chair up.
Trish was about to take the handles to push his chair but he stopped her, “I got it…”
She took her hands off of the handles but waited by his side until Shawn tried again to get up the ramp, this time succeeding but breathing heavily and his legs shaking badly.

Up on the porch Trish quickly unlocked the door and Shawn pushed himself over the threshold and wheeled straight to his bedroom. He didn’t speak, he was busy trying not to panic but he was hoping more than anything that only his bladder had leaked and nothing else. He was angry at himself for not having slipped into some extra protective briefs before they had left for the movie.
In his room he pushed his chair right up to his bed. In bouts his legs were shaking violently, then not so hard, then almost coming off the foot rest again.

Trish had followed him to his room but she wasn’t all the way sure if Shawn wanted her help with anything or if he would have rather been left alone.  Still without asking she squatted down in front of him and held his feet somewhat steady to untie the laces of his sneakers, she felt his legs tremble without stopping. Shawn didn’t protest as he watched her take his sneakers off and as much as he did not want to be like this in front of Trish, there was nothing he could do at the moment.

Trish stood up, “You want to try to get into your bed.”
He nodded fighting another spasm. His legs were out of control now, he needed his medication. He pulled all his strength together and transferred into his bed with Trish supporting him. He had almost no control over his trunk at the moment. He laid back, Trish had propped two pillows behind his back.
“Can you bring me some water and give me two Baclofen out of the vial right there?”
He glanced toward his bedside table and Trish grabbed the bottle of Baclofen tablets and handed it to Shawn, “I’ll get some water.”
She hurried out while Shawn got the tablets out.
He looked down at his jeans and saw the wet spot even bigger now. He really wanted to get out of his pants as soon as possible.
Trish came back with a glass of water, Shawn dropped the tablets into his mouth and drank from the water, swallowing the tablets.
She then rushed back out and a moment later came back with a wet wash cloth. To Shawn’s surprise she softly wiped over his sweaty face.
As much as he wanted to protest for a moment, he then let it be because it felt good. He tried to relax, waiting for the meds to kick in.

Trish said softly, “We need to get you out of your jeans, Shawn!”
He was terrified to hear her say that and she added, “Let me help you with it.”
Shawn didn’t respond, he didn’t like the idea at all but pondered on the suggestion. Trish pleaded, “Please! It’s o.k. for me.”
He was exhausted and still trembling all over his body. Admitting to himself that he could use her assistance at this moment wasn’t easy.
Trish softly touched his arm, “Shawn? Would it be O.K. if I help you with this?”
He answered lowly, “Do I have a choice?”
Trish didn’t know what to answer. Of course he had a choice but he could make it easier on himself if he would just let her help him out.
Just when she wanted to say something a weak smile brushed over Shawn’s face, “Yeah, I am O.K. with it. You should get a towel from the bathroom!”

Trish nodded at his request and left the room. Shawn started to unbutton and unzip his jeans with shaky hands. Trish came back with Latex gloves on her hands and she put the towel under the leg that was wet, “Here…”
She carefully put her hands on his waist and started wriggling his jeans down over his butt. They didn’t look at each other as Trish pulled his jeans all the way down over his legs. Shawn was very embarrassed and wanted to disappear. Trish exposed black boxer briefs wet with urine under his jeans.

Her nursing instincts took over and at that moment she only wanted to help Shawn out of his mess. He had his head laid back, avoiding Trish’s eyes by looking at the ceiling, still breathing in gasps and his legs were still trembling from the spasms.
Trish quickly tucked the towel some more under his leg and butt without a word. Shawn glanced at her momentarily as she was pulling his jeans all the way off over his feet and dropping them to the floor. She was very focused on the task.
She looked up to Shawn, “Do you want to catheterize?”
He shook his head and sat up a bit. His voice was weak and trembling, “I just want to get my boxers off.”
Shawn tried to sit up, holding himself up with his arms but another spasm shot through him and he fell back again, “Fuck!”
Trish said softly, “Just lay there…I will get it!” She put her hand on the waist of Shawn’s boxers, “I will pull them off now.”

What he had feared most had happened only a few days into their living arrangement. Watching Trish pull off his underwear, he literally saw his dignity and the little bit of toughness he had tried to keep up flow away with the urine leaking with every spasm. The incident in the bathroom the day before was one thing, this situation was a whole different story.
Trish walked out with the wet clothes.
Shawn had his arm over his eyes, the last attempt to somehow magically disappear which just didn’t happen. She came back with another wet wash cloth and Shawn glanced through under his arm watching how Trish wiped his leg and his fully exposed manhood. His breathing now was not so much because of spasms anymore but much more due to sheer embarrassment and shame.
Trish stayed calm and focused wiping his leg and his privates and dried him with the towel from under his butt, “Shawn, where are your incontinence briefs?”
He said in a mumble without looking at her, “Under the bed and in the closet!”
She leaned down to look under the bed, pulled one of the padded briefs from the package and then silently slid them over Shawn’s skinny, lifeless legs up to his privates.  

Shawn’s spasms had weakened, he still had his arm over his face but when he glanced through again he saw Trish just looking at his legs and then he saw her put her hand on his leg and let her hand glide over it. She then quickly pulled her hand off and she pulled the sheet over him covering him to his belly.
“Shawn? Are you o.k. right now? Seems like your med is kicking in.”
Shawn moved his arm from his eyes, it was difficult for him to look at Trish, “Yes, thanks…I know…this…”
He couldn’t really speak and Trish took over the word, “You are welcome…I’m happy I could help. Is there anything else you need right now?”
“Well, I will be washing clothes. Try to get some rest.”
He nodded and to his surprise she took the washcloth she had used for his face earlier and dabbed his forehead again, saying softly, “I know all of this was difficult for you, Shawn…I want you to know that it was totally O.K. for me to help you and be there for you.”
He couldn’t say anything.
“Well, I will be out there…I can leave the door open if you want…call me if you need me!”
All he could do was nod. He was exhausted now, the spasms had almost subsided and only small shock waves travelled through his body, trying to swallow up the last little bit of strength he had left.
Trish walked out and he could barely hold his eyes open or even think any further about what had just happened.

Trish started a load of clothes in the washer. Even though she had acted instinctively trying to help Shawn to her best ability and had been fully focused and discreet when she finally plopped on the couch she laid her head back with a sigh, trying to process the situation.
Seeing Shawn so helpless and vulnerable wasn’t easy, she knew he wanted to disappear, it had been difficult for him as well. She had seen his most intimate body parts when taking off his underwear, she had seen his legs thin and without life, one leg showing obvious scars around his knee and thigh.
She had been nervous about it all but she had not had a choice and when she helped him with all of it, it really wasn’t a big deal for her. She knew about these things, she dealt with them regularly in her job at the nursing home. The difference was that her patients at the nursing home did not attract her in any way whereas Shawn was an attractive guy her age and it was a lot different to be assisting him with these very private issues.  

She also knew that the very intimate urges of urinating and defecating were usually the most challenging to face for a person becoming paraplegic or quadriplegic. She saw it was terrifying for Shawn what had happened and to be like this in front of her but despite the whole situation she had experienced with him she still felt very attracted to him. The incident had not spoiled it for her, she was in her element when she helped him, but she knew it was different for him.
She felt a kind of relief that what she had went through with Shawn had not changed her attraction to him. It was an additional confirmation to her that she was indeed a devotee of disabled men. She would make it her mission to let him know as soon as the opportunity would arise.
Trish thought about the last three days with Shawn and how they had been overshadowed by the things that had happened so far.

As she was lost in thoughts Shawn’s cell phone played its ringtone in his back pack and Trish jumped up to dig the phone out of it.
She saw Jesse’s picture on the display and answered, “Hello!”
She heard Jesse on the other line a bit surprised, “Trish? Hey, it’s Jesse!”
“Hi Jesse!”
“Trish how are you?”
“I am good…how about you?”
“I’m all right, just pretty busy.”
He started talking briefly about his work and then asked, “How’s Shawn?”
Trish replied lowly, “He’s actually asleep.”
“Asleep already?”
“Yes…” Trish thought for a moment if she should tell Jesse about the day, “We went to a movie today…”
“Oh really, you got Shawn to go to a movie?”
She told him how it taken some persuasion for her to get Shawn to go with her but how they ended up having a good time.
Jesse sounded pleased but also a little suspicious, “So he was tired then?”
“Yes, he was…” Trish felt she sounded a bit shaky and Jesse must have sensed it, “Trish, is everything o.k.?”
She sighed, “Yes, everything is o.k.”
Jesse was too alert to not realize something was going on, “Trish, what happened? Is Shawn all right?”
“Nothing happened, I don’t want to worry you.”
Jesse sounded impatient, “You are doing just that right now…Please tell me what did Shawn do?”
“Shawn didn’t do anything Jesse…”
“So what is going on then, Trish…” He sounded genuinely worried now.

Trish answered lowly, “Shawn has had a rough day…he had some severe spasms today…it started after the movie. We wanted to go to dinner but it got too bad and we couldn’t go and instead we came home.”
Jesse wanted more, “And?”
“Well, we came home. I helped him into bed, the spasms had caused his bladder to leak, it was a bit of a mess…it was difficult for him to let me help him with all of it…he still has difficulties accepting my help.”
Jesse sighed, “I’m sorry you had to deal with all of that…he goes weeks without spasms and then there comes a time when they really kick his butt and he is down for days…are you O.K.? He is not being an ass to you though, is he?”
“No, not at all…it is not easy for him to take help from me though.”
She thought about Shawn falling in the bath tub but decided against telling Jesse, she didn’t want to worry him more than he already did.
Jesse asked, “Are you sure you are O.K. with all of it?”
“Yes, I am totally O.K. with it and I am trying to make him feel at ease with me.”
Jesse said lowly, “I know it is not easy for him to let you come so close to him…I just hope he will come around.”
“It will be O.K., don’t worry about us Jesse. I want you to be able to focus on your job and all…I know this job is important to you guys.”
“Thanks Trish…I am very glad you are there with Shawn.”

He paused for a moment until he said lowly, “I have been thinking about our night together quite a bit this week.”
Trish was surprised about that comment, “Yes, it was a good night!”
Jesse laughed softly, “You almost caused me to not take the job.”
Trish said softly, “Jesse…”
He cut her off, “Yeah, I know, it’s all good…I guess it was a very nice send off for me. I am still feeding off of it down here with all these guys around, too much testosterone in one place can be annoying.”
Trish laughed, “I can just imagine.”
Jesse laughed again, “Believe me, you can’t. Anyways, I did enjoy our night together and I am very happy you snuck into my room that night but I get it, we had a deal, no strings attached. I will let you go now. Please Trish, if anything is going on you can call me at any time.”
“I know, I just don’t want you to worry about us.”
“I know, I don’t want to lose your help with Shawn and you being there with him, I am very thankful you are there and I trust you…but don’t hesitate to call me if things are weird or just anything.”
“I will! I will also tell Shawn that you called!”
“Did he take his meds for the spasms?”
“Yes, he did and they subsided after a while, but he got very tired.”
“Yeah, one of the side effects, he may be out for a while.”
“That’s O.K.”
“Hey, I will try to call again tomorrow!” 
Trish could tell that Jesse was very worried about Shawn and about how things were working out with her, and she confirmed again, “Please, don’t worry about us, Jesse!”
“I will try not to…well, Trish, take care then and I will talk to you tomorrow.”
 “Good, you take care and have a Good Night.”
“Thanks, you too. Talk to you later.”
 “O.k. Bye Jesse!”
“Bye Trish!”

Trish pushed the end call button on Shawn’s phone and laid her head back again. She was concerned that Jesse had mentioned their night together and it made her nervous. He was a great guy, any woman would want to be with him and she thought about who she would choose between the two brothers and Shawn was the one who kept coming up in her mind. She was glad that Jesse was far away and she was hoping he wouldn’t want more out of their friendship and one night stand.

It was after eight o’clock and Trish decided to check on Shawn. She carefully walked up to his room and peeked in. Shawn’s breathing was soft and regular. He was still covered up and she realized he had his shirt off too. It was laying on the floor next to the bed. She quietly picked it up and draped it over the chair in the room. She moved her eyes over to Shawn for a moment, scanning his face and naked chest and took a deep breath. Before she walked out she made sure his wheelchair was right by his bed so he could transfer into it if he needed to.


  1. I love this story. Hope your self doubt lifts soon. It doesn't need explicit sex, each chapter has a sexy devvy moment. Please keep going!

  2. I think this was your best chapter yet!

  3. I love the nice slow progression of their relationship. It's is really building up nicely. Don't change a thing. It is great!! I look forward to it more every week!

  4. Fantastic chapter! I really like the way the story is slowly unfolding.

  5. This was a wonderful chapter! Please don't doubt yourself, this chapter was right in the money. I look forward to the next chapter to see how things progress after this incident.

  6. I love that you take the time to get into the head of each of your characters and let their relationship blossom in its own time. Your writing is exceptional.

  7. Great chapter! Sex is not necessarily what we want, we want devvy scenes, and you are delivering!

  8. I agree with all of the above. According to me it is the best chapter so far and without sex!

  9. I agree with all of the above. According to me it is the best chapter so far and without sex!