Wednesday, January 13, 2016

For The Love Of Not Walking Chapter 20

Kieran has some difficult  explaining to do but leaves his family still wondering about what is going on with him. Erin is by his side but a text message from Sarah makes things difficult.

Chapter 20
With wide open eyes Ashleigh pressed her fist to her mouth and Fiona stared at Kieran in complete disbelief.
Erin was still on the phone, “Kieran, what is it?”
Kieran was terrified and he dropped his phone to the ground.
Fiona came closer and in the process she pushed the Quickie further out of the way, “Kieran, what the hell is going on?”
He couldn’t find his voice and he could only feel his heart beat into his neck. His hands were trembling and sweaty as he stood there freely in the bathroom. He felt the need to hold on to something.
Fiona came even closer and looked up and down his legs, “What are you doing Kieran? Why are you doing this?”
She didn’t sound happy for him but judgmental instead. Ashleigh was on the verge of crying, shaking her head in disbelief.
Kieran attempted to speak.
His voice was weak and hoarse, “Fiona…it’s not what it looks like.”
“Kieran, what the hell is this supposed to look like? You are standing…why are you standing?”
When he took a few steps toward Fiona she backed up almost fearfully and he stepped out of the bathroom.
“Kieran, you need to explain what is going on here?”

Erin heard the whole conversation and tried to shout through the phone but no one heard her or paid attention to her distant voice. Kieran’s phone was on the floor in the bathroom.
Fiona looked terrified, “Have you been faking all of this the whole time?”
Kieran now was worried, and tried to explain, “God no, Fiona…it’s a long story. I couldn’t tell you guys because it’s so weird. You wouldn’t have believed me.”

Just at that very moment, the sensation left his body and his Quickie seemed like miles away from where he was standing as he looked over to it.
He could only look at Fiona and Ashleigh, stretched his hand out toward his wheelchair and tried to say something before he couldn’t stand anymore, “I need…”

His knees buckled and his body collapsed as he fell to the ground with full force, trying to somehow brace himself with his hands and hitting his head hard on the dresser as he fell. In the process he cursed into the room. Fiona and Ashleigh couldn’t get to him quick enough and could only watch in terror witnessing Kieran’s hard fall.

Fiona rushed over to him, calling out to her daughter, “Ash, go get daddy real quick!”
Ashleigh ran out of the room and Fiona kneeled next to Kieran who moaned with a pain stricken face. He grabbed his head with his hand.
“Kieran, are you all right?”
Fiona scanned his head and body but didn’t see any visible injuries.

Kieran’s phone was still on the ground in the bathroom but when Erin had realized no one had heard her she had hung up. At this very moment she was slipping into some clothes and gathering her things to rush over to Kieran’s house.

Fiona couldn’t help some tears from flowing, “Kieran, what on earth is going on with you?”
He only spoke low and with a trembling voice, “I don’t know…please don’t…”
He was interrupted by Tyler rushing into the room, “Kieran, what is going on in here, bro?”
Fiona let her husband get access to Kieran on the floor, and she tried to explain, “He fell…but he was… he was standing…”
Tyler looked confused from Fiona to Kieran, “Standing? What are you talking about Fiona?”
He squatted down and helped Kieran sit up. Kieran moaned in pain, his head had suffered a severe blow when he had hit the dresser and the floor.
Tyler supported him in the back and assisted him to sit up and eventually let him lean on the dresser. Ashleigh and Dominic stood in the doorway and watched their parents help Kieran.
Ashleigh was still in shock in having seen her uncle stand on his two legs. He had seemed so tall to her standing there in the bathroom, and it was all so very strange.

Tyler remarked, “I think we should go to the ER.”
Kieran was alerted at the words, “I don’t need to go to the hospital. Just help me get into my bed.”
Tyler was a strong man and eventually lifted Kieran from the ground and quickly made his way to the bed where he carefully released him onto the bed. Fiona was still in shock and quietly watched her husband help he brother. Tears were still in her eyes as she was trying to figure out what was going on with him.
She stood next to the bed, her arm around a sleepy Dominic, who watched the scene in confusion. Ashleigh had a difficult time watching the whole ordeal and once Kieran was on the bed she walked up to him and leaned down to him hugging him and mumbling into his hair, “I’m so worried about you Uncle Kieran. What is going on with you?”
He didn’t answer but hugged his niece tightly for a moment until they let go. Ashleigh sat down on the edge of the bed and looked at her uncle with worry.
Kieran’s body was trembling from spasms now, his legs twitched on the bed as Tyler was trying to untie his sneakers and eventually was able to take them off.
Kieran tried to avoid looking at his family. He was breathing quickly and was trying to stay in control of the spasms getting stronger now.

For a moment he met his sister’s eyes and saw the sadness in her face. Another spasm ran up his leg, throwing it over to the side some and he asked lowly looking at Dominic, “Nicky, can you get me some water?”
Dominic nodded eagerly, glad he could now also assist in this strange situation. He ran out of the room and momentarily came back with a glass of water. Kieran reached over to his bedside table to get the one Baclofen tablet that was there.
He dropped it in his mouth and swallowed it with a sip of water.

Tyler stayed collected and now sat on the foot end of the bed, “Kieran, what the hell is going on?”
Fiona moved closer to the bed and sat down next to her husband. Kieran saw how she softly rested her hand on his twitching left leg.
Dominic walked around the other side of the bed and Kieran was surprised when he actually crawled into the bed with him, “I’m still tired.”

Kieran’s head hurt like he had a very intense headache. His vision was blurry and he felt somewhat nauseated. He could barely move his head because it hurt with every motion. He closed his eyes, not really wanting to meet his family’s curious and worried looks.
Tyler asked, “Kieran, are you sure about not wanting to go to the ER?”
Kieran answered without opening his eyes, “Yes, I’m sure. It’s just a headache.”
“It could be a concussion? They could do an MRI.”
“I’ll just lay here.”
Fiona finally spoke, “I’ll stay in here with you. If you have a concussion I won’t let you sleep or anything. I want to make sure it’s not a head injury.”
Tyler softly rubbed his wife’s back and asked, “Are you sure babe? I can stay with him.”
“No, I’m okay. I’ll stay here with him.”
Ashleigh looked at her parents, “I can stay too.”
Fiona said, “No, I want you and Nicky to go to bed right now. You guys need to sleep.”
Dominic purposely slid further under the blanket and pouted, “But I want to stay in Uncle Kieran’s bed.”

Just as Fiona wanted to say something the bell on the front door rang.
Everyone was startled at the nightly ring and Tyler got up quickly, “I’ll go check. Stay in here.”
Fiona was worried about her husband, “Be careful babe.”
She stood up and walked toward Kieran’s door with Tyler and watched as he walked through the hallway towards the front door.
She heard him ask loudly, “Who is this?”

It was almost 2 o’clock in the morning now. After a moment Fiona heard the door open and she was wondering who her husband could be opening the door for at this time of the night.
A few seconds later, Tyler came back into the hallway followed by Erin. Tyler didn’t say anything but let the two women greet each other.
Erin explained, “I was on the phone with Kieran when it happened. You guys didn’t hear me through the phone but I left my house right away to come over. Is he all right?”
Fiona looked at Erin questioningly, “He suffered a blow to the head for sure. I’m not sure if there are any other injuries.”
Erin looked worried and scared and was just about to walk by Fiona when Fiona stopped her, “Erin, do you know anything about this?”
Erin sighed and pressed her lips together, nodding slightly.
“What is going on with him?”
“He should tell you himself.”
Fiona looked at Erin suspiciously but let her pass and watched her hurry into his room.

Erin quickly was at his bedside, “Kieran, it’s me!”
Kieran opened his eyes slowly and looked at Erin with blood shot eyes.
His legs were still spastic and Erin glanced at them momentarily before she asked, “Are you all right?”
He took a deep breath feeling a pressure in his chest as he answered, “I think so…”
“I’m here now.” She took his hand in hers, his hand was warm in comparison with her own hand and she held it tightly.

Tyler explained the possibility of Kieran having suffered a concussion.
Erin looked from Tyler to Kieran, “You can’t go to sleep right now baby if you really have a concussion.”
Fiona turned to her daughter, “Honey, can you please set some coffee on for us?”
Ashleigh nodded and walked out.

Kieran closed his eyes again and Tyler said, “Kieran, open your eyes man. If you’re falling asleep on me I’m taking you to the ER.”
This seemed to worry Kieran so much that he slowly opened his eyes and they were on Erin right away, “I’m sorry.”
Erin shook her head, “You have nothing to be sorry about.”
She leaned over him and kissed him softly on his lips, tasting salty tears on his face.
“You need to stay awake now.”
Kieran’s legs twitched again and he arched his back some at a strong spasm.
Erin watched this with a concerned face and Fiona stated, “He already took some medication for the spasms. Hopefully it will kick in soon.”

Dominic still rested in Kieran’s bed and had closed his eyes when his mom said, “Nicky, go to your own bed!”
Dominic shifted and protested, “I don’t want to.”
Fiona sounded stern now, “Nicky, I mean it. Uncle Kieran needs to rest now and you need to get your sleep.”
Lethargically Dominic scrambled out of the bed but before he could walk away Kieran said, “Hey Nicky, here…give me a hug.”
Dominic leaned over to his Uncle and hugged him, mumbling, “I hope you will get better again.”
Kieran confirmed, “I’ll be all right. Go to sleep now. Tomorrow we’ll talk.”
Dominic went from his dad to his mom and hugged them.
Tyler said, “Thanks little dude, get some sleep now. I love you.”
Fiona told him the same thing and Dominic was off.

For a few moments only the adults were in the room.
Everyone was thinking things but no one said anything.
Eventually Kieran closed his eyes again and Erin tugged on him, “Kieran, open your eyes.”
He was startled and opened his eyes again. Kieran was sitting up somewhat, and the spasms were getting weaker now.
Ashleigh came in with the coffee pot and cups on a tray. She set it all down on the table in the room.
Fiona thanked her, Erin smiled at her and Tyler started pouring coffee.

Kieran looked at Erin and said lowly, “Thanks for coming over.”
“No other place I should be right now.”
She held his hand in hers. Kieran closed his eyes again, he felt exhausted and very tired but again Erin demanded, “Keep your eyes open.”
“I can’t. I’m so tired.”
Kieran didn’t seem to be in the moment, he seemed somewhat confused. Erin could tell he was drained of any energy but she was worried about him too.
“Maybe we should take you to the ER and get your head checked?”
With those words Kieran opened his eyes again, “I don’t want to go to the ER.”
Tyler cut in, “Kieran, Erin is right too…you may have a concussion?”
“And…there is nothing they can do. They will just tell me to rest. We don’t need to go to the ER.”
Tyler, Fiona and Erin looked at each other while Kieran closed his eyes again.

Fiona’s mind was racing at what do with her brother. She wanted to respect his wish about not going to the hospital but she was worried sick about him. And for some reason she also felt angry at him because she couldn’t explain anything that was happening and she thought somehow Kieran had kept important information from them or had been playing some kind of strange game with them.

She stood next to the bed and with a trembling voice she asked tensely, “Kieran, how are you able to stand? You need to explain to all of us what is going on with you. Why are you doing this?”
Tyler stood next to her and put his arms around his visibly shaking wife, and he said softly, “Baby, Kieran can tell us tomorrow.”
“No, I want to know now.”
Kieran opened his eyes slowly and turned his head toward her. He felt Erin’s hand squeeze his hand tighter.

Lowly he started with a trembling voice, “I’m not doing this or faking anything. Something happened after I met Erin and if I tell you any of it, you will think I’m crazy. You have to promise me that you won’t get me admitted. Everything I’m about to tell you is the truth and I can’t explain it or know what and why this is. It has made my life miserable lately and I wish it would stop.”
Fiona pulled a chair closer and sat down, Tyler dropped onto the armchair in Kieran’s room.
Erin shifted and moved closer to Kieran and held his hand tightly in hers.
Kieran was breathing quickly as he laid there, trying to keep his eyes open, to stay awake and about to tell his family what had been occurring for a couple of weeks now.
Fiona said strictly, “I’m not leaving until you tell me what is going on.”

Kieran didn’t know if he was capable of telling them right now but he had a feeling Fiona was serious about her demand.
He told the whole story in a shorter version and during the telling of it tears just ran down his cheeks, slowly but continuously.

Erin had to look away a few times because she knew how difficult all of this was for him and how he tried to sound somewhat sane in explaining what had been happening. Even though it was all so strange she wanted to believe him and she wanted to be by his side through this. After all she was in some way the trigger of this very mysterious situation in Kieran’s life and had most likely put him in front of a decision he had to make and a decision that may be the toughest one in his life.
She didn’t want to lose him over this and inside she feared more than anything that he would decide against what they had if he could then regain his sensations and be walking again.

He paused a few times in the middle of talking, swallowing and trying to keep from falling asleep. His head hurt and he could barely move it. Any movement shot stings of pain through his head and felt like a very severe migraine. Erin knew it was draining for him to tell his sister about everything that had been going on but Fiona sat in the chair showing no mercy or cutting him a break in the telling of the story. She listened to everything and held a cup of coffee in her hand. Tyler dozed off a few times in between and Erin could feel fatigue overcome her now.
She had moved around to the other side of the bed and had slipped her shoes off and had climbed into bed next to Kieran.

Kieran finished, “Now you saw it with your own eyes and if I could I would show you again but I can’t. I’m just as paralyzed as before. It’s only for this short period of time every night.”
He had also told them that he had not experienced the same thing the night before at Erin’s house.
Now Fiona just shook her head and said lowly, “There must be an explanation for this. Maybe spasms or something. We should get you in to see the Neurologist.”
Kieran replied lowly, “Fiona, there is no explanation.”
He was absolutely exhausted now and added, “I can’t talk right now anymore…can we go over it in the morning?”
His head was pounding now, he looked at Erin. Tyler was startled on the armchair and woke up from yet another short nap.
He shifted and said lowly, “Babe, why don’t we leave Kieran for right now and let him get some rest.”
He turned to look at Erin, “Would it be okay for you to stay here with him?”
Erin nodded, “Of course.”
Tyler got up and he touched his wife’s arm, “Fiona, let it go for right now.”

Fiona kept looking at Kieran in disbelief. She still didn’t know what to think of her brother’s strange story and he felt her doubts.
She walked over to the bed and Kieran looked at her with tired eyes, “Fiona I know you don’t believe me. I can see it in your face and I know you wanted to hear some other factual explanation but I don’t have one.”
He paused for a moment and took a breath, his facial expression full of pain, “I wish this would have never happened to me.”

Fiona looked down and then from her brother to Erin. She wanted to know what Erin thought but felt she wouldn’t push this any further at the moment. She was tired too.
She leaned down to Kieran and hugged him, saying at the same time, “I love you Kieran and I wish you wouldn’t have to deal with all of this stuff. I know it has been overwhelming for you and it’s no surprise that you are seeing and experiencing strange things. You have been through so much since that night.”
She stood up and Kieran had heard all the doubts in her words and just kept his eyes on his sister.
Fiona turned to Erin, “Erin, if anything is going on, please don’t hesitate to get us. I probably won’t be sleeping a whole lot anymore. This was a lot. I still think we should have taken him to the ER.”
Erin sat up, “I will keep an eye on him.”
“Thank you.”
Erin smiled at her and they watched Fiona walk out and close the door behind her.

Kieran remarked lowly, “She doesn’t believe me.”
Erin sat up and looked at him with worry, “You don’t know that. It’s difficult to process, Kieran.”
She stroked a strand of hair out of his eye, “How are you feeling?”
“Not great.”

Kieran looked down his legs who laid motionless on the bed, still in his jeans and he remembered that he had not catheterized in a few hours. Even though he was all but fit he needed to get into the bathroom once more.
He pushed himself up some on his hands and his head hurt badly, he had to stop and breathe through the pain.
Erin was worried about him, “What is it?”
“I need to cath.”
She wasn’t all the way sure what that encompassed but she asked, “How can I help you?”
Kieran saw his Quickie over by the bathroom, “If you could bring me my chair.”

Erin jumped out of the bed and pushed his wheelchair around to his side. Kieran didn’t know if he could actually make the transfer and with shaking arms he pushed his legs over the side of the bed. Erin watched him and saw he had a hard time with any movement. His Quickie was next to him and he placed his hands in their usual position on the chair and the bed and under Erin’s curious eyes he transferred over and upon sitting down he stopped in any movement and cursed lowly with closed eyes, “Shit.”

Erin wanted to help him but without saying anything he put his hands to his rims and slowly wheeled to the bathroom. He pushed the door some but left a crack and Erin walked over on soft feet and without Kieran knowing she spied through the crack and watched as he washed his hands in the sink, then positioned his wheelchair next to the toilet and unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans, then pulled out a long small package and fiddled with the wrapping until he held a thin long tube in his hands.

Erin held her breath as she watched Kieran curiously and for a moment she got a glimpse of his penis as he pulled it out of his jeans and then inserted the catheter tubing into his urethra. She had never seen anything like it and now she heard the urine flow into the toilet and Kieran sitting still holding the tubing in position and watching the whole thing. She saw him breathe as his body moved up and down and he seemed very exhausted as his head somewhat hung over and his hair was falling into his face. She stood there and watched as he pulled the tubing out and finished the task of catherization. Instead of moving away from the toilet though he just sat there for a moment and didn’t move. He held himself up with his one hand on the frame around the toilet and was just breathing.

Erin stepped away from the door and called softly, “Kieran, everything all right?”
He answered lowly, “Yes, I’ll be right out.”
She sat on the bed when he came wheeling out into the room and he looked pale and had dark circles under his eyes as he approached the bed again on the other side.
She watched as he got back onto his bed with a pain stricken face, his lips pressed together as he tried to block out the pain.
Erin climbed back onto the bed next to him as Kieran leaned his head on his head board, and his face toward the ceiling with closed eyes. His legs laid twisted over each other.
She asked him softly, “May I uncross your legs?”
His voice was barely audible, “Yeah…”
She moved down and gently straightened his legs and placed them next to each other.
She looked up at him, “Do you want to get out of your jeans?”
He stretched his hand toward her and said lowly, “I can’t do anything anymore….I’m so exhausted, I’m about to pass out. Just come up here next to me. My head hurts a lot.”

She moved up to him. She had only slipped into some yoga pants at her house and a plain T-Shirt with a hoodie over it.
Kieran had his arm around her and she looked at him, “Kieran, tell me how you really feel.”
His eyes were closed, “Like shit!”
“I’m worried about you.”
“Don’t be, I’ll be all right.”

For a moment they were quiet and when Erin looked at him his eyes were closed and his breathing had become soft and regular. His head had fallen to the side some, he had fallen asleep.
When Erin moved he was startled and looked up at her, saying lowly, “Erin, I need to lay down…I can’t hold my eyes open anymore.”
She was tired herself and watched as he pushed his body down onto the bed and finally lay with his head on the pillow.

Erin snuggled up against him and once they were positioned he said lowly with his eyes closed and sleepy voice, “Erin, do you believe me?”
Erin was surprised about the question but answered, “Yes, I believe you, Kieran. I’m here for you no matter what you decide.”
Hearing her say this hurt him because the words reminded him once again that there was a decision to be made and hanging over him like a very dark cloud.
Erin then added, “I love you Kieran.”
He looked at her, moving his head very slowly.
His tired green eyes were shiny as he tried to think of what to say.
Lowly he started, “Erin…I…am…I can’t say it back to you…I’m so sorry.”
A tear ran down the side of his face and Erin just stroked her hand over his cheek, “It’s all right.”

He pulled her closer and kissed her softly on the lips, then they fell asleep in each other’s arms. Kieran’s sleep was restless though and about two hours later he woke up sweating and panting as he had been haunted in his dreams by nightmarish visions. His head was still pounding painfully and Erin woke up as he tried to shift his body and moaned under pain.
Erin asked softly into the darkness, “Kieran, are you all right?”
“My head just hurts still. I was dreaming shit.”
“Is there anything I can do for you?”
“I don’t think so.”

Kieran pulled his T-Shirt off. Erin could feel the heat radiating from him, the slight moisture and scent of sweat on his body.
When she laid her hand on his chest she touched the scar running down from his neck to his belly. Kieran didn’t notice how she ran her finger slightly over it and he didn’t realize how her breathing became quicker.

He had closed his eyes again but the pain in his head made it impossible to go back to sleep. It was now almost six o’clock in the morning, outside the night was slowly turning into day. Fall was around the corner though as every morning it took longer to become daylight. It was Sunday and when Kieran knew he couldn’t sleep anymore he just laid there and listened to Erin breathe next to him. She had fallen asleep again.

It was about thirty minutes later when Kieran heard a noise outside in the hallway and shortly after a low knock on his door.
He answered lowly, “Yes.”
The door opened and Fiona came in soft footed and as quiet as possible.
She whispered, “How is your head?”
Kieran could only see the dark silhouette of his sister next to the bed.
He whispered his answer, “It hurts.”
“Did you stay awake the whole time?”
“No, I dozed off for a little while.”
“Why is Erin sleeping? She’s supposed to keep an eye on you.”
“Fiona, she was tired, I’m all right. I’m talking to you, ain’t I, so back off.”
"It’s just weird somehow that she’s here.”
Kieran was tense now at his sister’s comments about Erin, “It’s none of your business. I don’t find it weird. I’m glad she is here.”
“It just doesn’t seem right.”
Kieran now whispered sharply, “What the fuck Fiona? Are you going to say next that this is your house or some shit like that?”
Fiona mumbled while walking away, “It kind of is and she is your niece’s best friend’s mother.”

Kieran didn’t get a chance to say anything else as his sister walked out and closed the door.
He glanced down at Erin’s head in the crease of his arm and hoped she would really be asleep and not have heard any of this.
Her breathing came regular and she seemed to be sleeping soundly.

It was after nine o’clock when Kieran knew he very much needed to get back into the bathroom to cath. He slowly moved his arm out from under Erin and as quietly as possible he transferred into his Quickie next to the bed. Erin moved in his bed and moaned in her sleep. He closed the bathroom door behind him. When he looked in the mirror he was shocked at the dark rings under his eyes, his hair was stringy on his head and his skin blotchy. He had barely gotten any sleep during the night and his head still hurt even though not as much as it had been earlier in the night.

He emptied his bladder and also got on the toilet to attempt a bowel movement which was successful. He felt relieved and decided to just get into the shower. He moved slowly and clumsily pulled his jeans and boxers off. In front of the tub he parked his Quickie in the right angle and moved close to the shower chair so he could transfer over. He made the transfer, pulled the shower curtain and adjusted his position on the chair, then turned the knob of the faucet. He waited for the water to get warm enough and let the water run over his body. It felt good on his shoulders and face, and his thoughts drifted off to the night and how everything had happened. He also thought about Erin right outside the bathroom lying in his bed. His legs were twitching slightly and were falling from side to side. He kept adjusting their position.

As she slowly woke up Erin heard the water running in the bathroom. She still felt very tired and exhausted, it had been a rough night with not enough sleep at all. She realized Kieran wasn’t next to her anymore. She heard the water in the shower and she pondered getting up and joining him. Slowly she sat up, leaned on the head board and looked around the room. In a corner she noticed Kieran’s forearm crutches and she wondered why he had them. They really were a leftover item from rehab, where he had tried to stand with braces on his legs and maybe take a few steps which ended in a disaster every time. His legs just didn’t have the ability anymore. After a few exhausting and frustrating tries of being in braces Kieran stopped this altogether and had decided he would never consider it again. His injury was complete and made it impossible for him to walk. Even standing had been difficult because he basically had to hold his body weight up with his arms, so the standing usually didn’t last very long.

She looked over to the bathroom and realized she had to pee but with Kieran in there she would have to wait. Everything that happened the day and night before had been surreal to her and even though she wanted to believe Kieran all the way she had a slight doubt in her mind about all the things he had said to her.

She checked her phone for messages and the news on her social media sites, waiting for Kieran to get done. She heard the water stop and she heard noises in the bathroom. She pondered if Kieran was all right in there or if he needed assistance. Just then Kieran’s cell phone on his bedside table lit up announcing a new text message with a whistling tone. Erin glanced over to it and climbed over the bed and when she glimpsed at his phone it was still lit up for a moment and she saw the beginning of a message:
“Hey hot stuff, it was nice meeting you last night. Did you…..”

The phone went dark and she didn’t see the rest of the message but she felt her hands tremble at what she had just read. She knew Kieran had went to a bar after he had left her house the night before. Now she speculated about who had sent him this message.

She felt a lump in her throat and stared over to the bathroom where she heard noises and Kieran apparently getting out of the shower. She was startled when he actually came wheeling out of the bathroom and only had a large towel draped over his legs. She only saw his naked feet on the foot rest.
Kieran seemed surprised when he saw Erin sitting up in his bed, “Erin, hey…I hope I didn’t wake you up.”
She shook her head, “Not really. I was waking up already.”
Kieran felt shy about Erin seeing him this way, naked under the towel. He adjusted the towel so she couldn’t get a glimpse of his legs. He had been hoping she would still be asleep.
For a moment he deliberated wheeling over to the bed to give her a Good Morning kiss but he felt somewhat shy about it.
He was hoping she would maybe come over to him and he made sure to hold the towel in place so it wouldn’t slide down.

Erin looked at him and he was wondering about her serious expression. She didn’t look happy or excited to see him.
Lowly he said, “You still look tired. You should go back to sleep a little. I just couldn’t lay in bed anymore. I had to get up.”
Now Erin said lowly and with a serious expression, “You had a text message a moment ago.”
Kieran looked from her to his phone on the bedside table and wheeled over to it. He wondered about her seriousness and when he looked at the phone he saw the message was from Sarah.

“Hey hot stuff, it was nice meeting you last night. Did you have a chance to talk to your girlfriend yet about what I told you? Let me know how it goes.”

Kieran looked up at Erin and she asked him tensely, “So, who did you meet last night?”
He now realized this was a serious situation and answered with a shaky voice, “It was just this girl…”
Erin didn’t let him finish, “Just this girl…”
“Erin, it’s not what you are thinking. Here…”
He handed her the phone with the message and after Erin read it she looked up at him, “What are you supposed to tell me?”
Kieran felt odd sitting there without clothes and having to explain to Erin what was going on.
He attempted an explanation, “So, this girl came to me in the bar. We started talking and somehow the topic of you came up. Some of the things you said to me about how…” He paused, trying to find a good way to put it, “…about how you feel about me being in a wheelchair and paraplegic.”
Erin’s face looked pale and she started very tensely, “Somehow the topic of me came up…what the hell? Why are you telling people about this stuff? This is between me and you…”
Kieran realized right away that Erin was not happy with his explanation at all.

He panicked when she moved her legs over the edge of the bed and looked at him disappointed.
“Erin, hear me out please. It was nothing with this girl. She did come on to me and I told her right away I had a girlfriend and even though she acted like she was disappointed she kept talking to me and asked me if you were a devotee…”
Erin cut him off, “A what?”
Kieran really wanted to get dressed because he felt awkward sitting there with just a towel over his lower body.
“Erin, let me please put on some clothes and then I will tell you everything.”

Erin shrugged her shoulders and climbed off the bed to go to the bathroom herself. She closed the door behind her and Kieran wheeled over to the pile of clothes on the lounge chair and found his grey sweat pants in it. He also wheeled over to the dresser drawer to pull out a fresh pair of underwear.
He transferred over to the bed and leaning on the headboard he started to pull up his boxers and just when Erin came out he had them pulled up over his manhood.

Erin looked down shyly and was about to go back into the bathroom when Kieran said lowly, “It’s all right. I’m almost done.”
She didn’t get on the bed with him yet but glanced up at him and saw how he managed to pull on his sweats while on his bed. She felt her heart beat in her neck at watching him put on his clothes. Kieran tried to avoid her glances but then asked lowly, “Could you get me a pair of socks from my dresser?”
She nodded and walked over to the dresser. Kieran stated, “Second drawer from the bottom.”
Erin got a white pair of socks and came over to the bed.
Kieran thanked her and pulled the socks over his feet. When he looked up Erin looked away real quick.
He patted the bed next to him, “Please come up here with me.”
She went around to the other side and climbed back on the bed. Kieran put his arm around her and pulled her closer.
Erin didn’t say anything.

He started lowly, “Erin, I want you to know that I am taking all of this with you serious, you and me is serious and important to me. Nothing happened with that woman at the bar. She just started talking to me and came on to me kind of boldly. She said some things I didn’t understand at first. She referred to me as a “wheeling hottie” and she said she had a “thing for guys in wheelchairs”.”
At those words Erin looked at Kieran with a curious and alert expression.

Kieran met her dark eyes with his green eyes and said lowly, “I know, it was weird and no woman has ever talked to me like that. I was intrigued though and we started talking and right away I told her I had a girlfriend and then she asked me if you were a devotee. I have never heard this expression before. She then explained some stuff to me and it was all very strange but it kind of made sense pertaining what you had said before about my…” He took a breath and Erin looked away, “About my being in…in the wheelchair.”
Erin moved away from Kieran. She felt very embarrassed all the sudden and asked again tensely, “Why did you tell her stuff about me?”
“Erin, I didn’t say anything about you and what you said about me….but she just started telling me that there are women who are into disabled men…”
Erin got off the bed and Kieran shifted nervously, “Erin, what she said wasn’t bad or anything…”

Erin now slipped into her shoes and said lowly, “I should go home. I’m still very tired.”
Kieran held himself up on his hands watching Erin grab her purse, and he pleaded with a trembling voice, “Please don’t leave Erin. She sent me some links to some sites I guess. I thought we could look at it together. I didn’t know what a devotee is or that something like that even existed. I guess it is some sort of special attraction to disabled persons…”
Erin looked at Kieran and he saw her eyes were shiny and filled with tears, “I’m going home Kieran. You should rest with your head injury. I’m sorry…”

Now Kieran tried to slip to the edge of the bed and pondered if he should try to go after Erin but he didn’t want Fiona or anyone see him wheel after Erin knowing that they maybe had some issues.
He didn’t want Erin to leave and he regretted telling her about Sarah and what she had told him, “Erin, please…”
She walked out and closed the door. He was frustrated and violently hit the pillow with his fists, cursing lowly, “Fuck!”
Instead of things getting better everything seemed to be falling apart for him.

Erin was glad no one saw her leave. When Kieran had started talking about these strange things the woman had apparently told him she felt ashamed and bad. She questioned her intentions of being with Kieran and apparently there were some sick people out there who didn’t think anything of it to be attracted to a person because of their disability. She didn’t want to be part of that crowd. Tears were flowing from her eyes as she got in her car, started it and drove off toward her house.

No matter how hard she tried though, there was something about Kieran that excited her very much. She kept trying to push the fact of his being in the wheelchair aside, feeling sick and dumb to even think about him in that way and not being able to see him as just a man.
If Kieran would have been on his two legs he still would have been attractive to her but his being in the wheelchair made her head spin and she couldn’t stop thinking about him in that way and during the week had even masturbated to his vision in her head. It hadn’t taken very long at all to picture Kieran in his Quickie and doing certain things to her that brought her over the edge very quickly.
She felt bad and ashamed of her strange interest and she definitely didn’t want to be associated with a weird and sick group of people. Tears were flowing as she made her way home.

Kieran was left behind on his bed and he realized his head still hurt badly as he tried to move sudden when Erin walked out on him. Now he just sat on his bed, leaning on his head board and staring at the ceiling. He needed some pain meds but he didn’t have access to them, Fiona had kept all the medications away from him in fear he would get crazy ideas. Now he could have used some pain meds because his head felt like it was about to explode with a pounding headache and every move hurt. He closed his eyes and tried to relax into the pain. He didn’t hear anyone outside in the house. Apparently they were all still sleeping.


  1. Super nice update as usual. Thanks for this superb story.

  2. What an emotional chapter! You captured it really beautifully! Thanks!

  3. Suspense is killing me. Can't wait for what is next! I'm hooked. Many thanks for the great story.

  4. I'm worried that Kieran really needs to have some medical attention for that bump on his head. I wish he were a bit less stubborn!