Mark didn’t say anything but wheeled over to the bed with Chiara’s eyes on him.For a moment he sat there and he just looked at her letting his eyes travel over her body and he could only shake his head in admiration.
He saw dark spots on her skin, but couldn’t make out that he was looking at bruises and scars that covered her whole body.
He set the break on his TiLite and without words he transferred over onto the bed. Not for one moment Chiara moved her eyes away. She watched everything he did with total focus and her whole body was charged with the awakening.
Mark pulled his body up onto the bed and his legs just dragged behind him. They didn’t move, they didn’t twitch, they didn’t do anything. Chiara ran her hands over her thighs watching as he pulled himself all the way up on the bed and finally sat next to her leaning on the headboard.
He now looked at her and she shifted and looked at him. Without hesitation Mark moved his hands up to her hair and pushed it behind her ear again and now when he put his hand behind her head and pulled her to him, she didn’t pull away but stayed. He pulled her in for the kiss and she didn’t resist it. Her body radiated coolness and it made him want to get even closer to her because he wanted to keep her warm.
And his kiss was everything she had expected. It was strong and determined and instantly it made her forget everything bad in her life for a few moments. Mark held her to him and he gently pushed his tongue into her mouth. Chiara wrapped her arms around his neck and let Mark’s kiss flow into her.
After a few moments Mark let his lips unlatch from hers and she was surprised when with a strong and quick tug behind her back and around her waist with his hands he actually then pulled her off the headboard. He gently but determined pushed her down onto the bed and he leaned over her and his lips closed in on hers again continuing the kiss. Her body trembled at his assertive kissing.
Chiara was fully immersed in the moment feeling his warm skin on hers, his presence and weight over her and his lips on her lips. Her hand moved over his back and when she felt the vertebra of his spine it sent a shiver through her body. She also felt the uneven spots of the scarred skin on his back and she could only imagine what this meant.
Chills ran up her arms and she pressed herself even closer to him. Mark felt her cool hands on his upper back, on his neck, and on his arms and he enjoyed every bit of it. It had seemingly been forever since he had felt the touch of a woman on his body. And the last time he had indeed felt the hands of a woman on his body hadn’t only been the mere upper half that had had any kind of sensation. Back then it had still been his whole body from his toes to his head that felt every touch and every breeze of cold or warm air on his skin. Now every touch below his T-4 vertebra was lost in a world his brain wasn’t part of anymore.
Chiara held on to him and he held himself over her and he felt half of his body charged with such a longing it was driving him crazy. Their lips finally unlatched and they looked at each other, Chiara’s eyes were still glistening. She let her hands run through his hair and scanned his face.
Her hands travelled over his strong arms and his flexed biceps as he held himself over her. With her fingernails she softly traced across the skin of his upper back and he closed his eyes and took in the touch.Softly she whispered, “Tell me when you can’t feel it anymore.”
He didn’t open his eyes, he didn’t care anymore, he just wanted her close to him and he wanted her hands on his body. Her fingers softly traced over his back and around his shoulder blades and downward.He felt every flick of her soft fingertips and all the sudden he didn’t feel it anymore and he said barely audible, “There, that’s the spot.”
She played with her fingers on his back, testing out his sensations, “Right here?”
He nodded and he opened his eyes and looked into hers.
She now pulled him to her and now she led the kiss on his lips. Her mouth then travelled over to his ear and she nibbled and licked it softly. Mark’s heart raced at the sensation and he wanted so much more but at his T-4 vertebra his sensation stagnated into an unfulfilled state of longing and he almost pushed his face to her lips more because he wanted her tongue on his ear lobe.
When she flicked her tongue down to his neck, he could barely stand it. His hand explored her neck and his fingers moved to her breasts. He had chills all over his arms from her mouth softly latching on to his neck and with her tongue meeting his jugular vein right under the surface of his skin.
He hadn’t caressed a breast in a long time and he now tenderly kneaded it in his hands. It was warm and soft, perfectly filling out his large hands. When Chiara let off his neck for a moment, he took the opportunity to let his mouth come down to her breasts licking and suckling on her nipples to the point it was seemingly overwhelming him. Sweat beads built on his forehead and his heart beat like it wanted to pop out of his chest.
Chiara’s arms were wrapped around him and she still trailed with her fingers over his back. Thinking about his broken body and touching his spine and imagining the damaged cord inside made her head spin. Her loins were aching and throbbing like they had not done in a long time. She had never felt this way with anyone again since she had been with Aaron.
She then whispered into his ear, “Take your pants off.”
Mark was thrown off momentarily, but at the same time he thought to himself that this was to be expected. Chiara was completely naked and it was just a matter of time when he wanted his hands exploring parts of her body usually hidden away but now wide open for him to explore. It was in his head already, but he had kept himself in check to take it any further yet.
They disconnected and he looked at her, “You want me to take my pants off?”“Yes, I want to see and feel your legs on mine. I want you just like I am.”
Mark was slightly nervous at the outlook of having to fully expose his body to her. No one had seen him naked since he had come home paralyzed.
Chiara sat up now and pushed him down gently, “May I do it?”
Mark laid there next to Chiara and his eyes met hers.
He swallowed and with a scratchy trembling voice he then tried to explain, “I haven’t been…”
He stopped and didn’t know what he really wanted to say.
Chiara leaned over him and softly touched his face, whispering, “It’s okay.”
Mark didn’t even try to speak anymore and he now just watched as Chiara put her hands to his waistband. His heart was beating at seemingly ninety miles an hour. He felt the sweat on his forehead and his face felt hot. He put his arm over his eyes, somehow trying to shield himself from the exposure and humiliation.
Chiara sat there on her knees, completely naked and gently she then pulled his lounge pants over his legs. He closed his eyes and he took some deep breaths, telling himself in his mind that he had control of this. But instead he felt very out of control and vulnerable about everything below his T-4 vertebra. Chiara didn’t only pull his pants down but she had simultaneously also pulled his boxers off and when Mark opened his eyes and glanced down his body from under his arm, he was terrified to see his exposed manhood.
She was in the process of pulling his pants over his limp feet and as soon as she had the pants off, she also pulled off his socks. He now was completely naked like her and he wanted to disappear. His cock lay silent and limp like a deflated balloon, no arousal, no sign of an erection or any excitement. His legs had become skinny over the past three years, bony and not a lot of muscle anymore. He had been trying his best to keep his legs moving and with exercises to keep them from atrophying but there was not much he could do that in reality he watched his legs deteriorate with the permanent immobility right in front of his eyes.
Chiara stayed on her knees and looked at him and he wished nothing more than for her to come back down and be by his face where she couldn’t linger with her eyes on the dead lower half of his body. Up by his face at least he could distract with his kissing and touching her because she definitely didn’t have to do anything to him in his lower region because nothing would happen in terms of an erection or he even being able to penetrate her or ejaculate.
His mind was racing at how he was going to satisfy Chiara and what he possibly could do with his mouth and his tongue. But he hadn’t had any practice in his oral abilities because he had not been with anyone in over three years and had not had any opportunities to even try it out on a woman.
Back in his healthy days he had been skilled enough giving oral pleasure but it really hadn’t happened too often because usually his cock had pushed inside a pussy and that usually had done it for both him and the female counterpart or at least the women acted like it had. Thinking about this now he realized that he never had worried too much about pleasing the women he had been with. It had always seemed like they enjoyed what he had done to them so he hadn’t really wasted too much time thinking of their pleasure.
Now he lay there and he felt completely unprepared and insecure. Chiara still sat on her knees and now when he looked down, he saw she ran her hands over his skinny legs and down to his feet, which lay limp with his toes pointing forward. He couldn’t flex his feet anymore even if he tried with all his mental power. He even had been fitted with braces to help keep his feet from dropping but he never wore them. The AFO braces had been in his closet for the longest time because he didn’t think it made a difference if his feet just hung there or were in a flexed position. None of it mattered anymore because in his mind and usually in his words his legs were fucked either way, braces or not.
Mark’s eyes travelled over her body and again he didn’t miss the spots on her skin that he couldn’t really make out. They were on her belly, on her arms and on her thighs. And he wanted to know what those spots were and he felt the tension at his assumptions about them. Her body was small and fragile and her long red hair draped all the way down to her waist. Her breasts were perky and full enough to give her body a perfect shape with a small waist, curving just right and legs long enough to complete her beauty.
And Chiara sat there naked and lovely letting her hands gently run over his legs and to his feet, then up again and she finally met his eyes and he nodded at her and said softly, trying not to sound insecure, “Why don’t you come up here again? Not much happening down there.”
She then leaned down and he pushed himself up on his elbows. He watched as she gently let her lips come down on his legs and kissed his shins and up to his bony knees, then over his thighs. He was astonished at this and really didn’t know what to say. She literally caressed his legs with her mouth and she came up by his thighs and he got nervous as she neared his cock in its everlasting sleep.
But instead of sitting up she softly let her lips come down to his cock and she kissed it and then travelled further up flicking her tongue over his protruding hip bones and up to his chest, well defined and muscular in comparison to the rest of his body. Finally, she came up to his face when she just looked into his blue eyes and Mark could only look at her questioning.
She then whispered, “You have a beautiful body Mark.”
She then leaned over him and kissed him and laid herself halfway across his. Mark didn’t feel when she entangled her legs with his. She pushed her loins against his and felt his limp and soft cock on her swollen pussy lips. Mark had no idea. He couldn’t feel the friction and the pressure she produced onto his loins and hips with the slow rhythmic movements of her hips.
Her mouth had taken over his mouth once again and their tongues were intertwined playing games as they explored each other. Mark pushed his hands down on her ass and when he momentarily opened his eyes and got a glimpse, he realized how Chiara was pushing herself to him and how her legs were wrapped around his legs. He saw and felt her ass move in a slow pace, keeping the friction rubbing against Mark’s body.
He kissed her and his hands travelled over her back and down to her ass and back up. Chiara was stricken with Mark and his body and she wanted to really melt into him by pushing to him and rubbing her pussy on his soft cock. The thought of it not coming to life drove her crazy and she wanted nothing more than to give Mark some kind of release.
He held on to her and she felt his hands on her back and down by her ass. It felt so good to have his arms wrapped around her and she nestled herself into the crease of his neck, all the while still moving her lower body onto to him. The friction caused her nerves to vibrate in excitement and arousal.
She softly let her lips come off his lips and whispered, “Mark, I haven’t felt as safe as I feel with you in a long time.”Mark just looked at her and let her hair run through his fingers. His mind was racing at telling her about his concerns and about his lacking abilities when it came to sex.
His heart beat into his neck when he said softly, “I haven’t been with a woman since I’ve been paralyzed. I’m not really…”
He swallowed and tried again, “I’m not really sure what to do.”
Chiara let her eyes scan over his face and he added almost inaudible, “Things like for able bodied guys don’t work for me anymore.”
Mark wanted her to say something because he wasn’t sure how much longer he could just keep it together at being so close to Chiara and not being able to go about things the normal way.
She let her finger run over his cheek and said softly, “Don’t worry about that. I know and I don’t need what able bodied guys do. You’re everything I need and want and just being with you like this is the most wonderful thing.”
Mark now couldn’t help slight sarcasm sound through his next words, “Is it really?”
Chiara had stopped moving her body on him and she was somewhat thrown off with his question.
Mark wanted to know what all the things meant that she had said earlier, “Why is that? Why do you feel that way?”
Chiara still didn’t answer and he swallowed and asked with a trembling, “Explain to me how you feel about me. The things you have said and done, today, earlier…what does it mean?”
Chiara lowered her eyes and she felt tears come up at Mark’s questions. She was scared to tell him more but she sensed he wanted to know. And she was sad that their closeness had been interrupted. She immediately stopped moving her body on Mark.When Mark touched her arm, he felt chills on it.
“Why don’t we cover up? You feel cold.”
Quietly Chiara sat up and helped Mark pull the blanket out from under him. His lower body lay still and lifeless and she then draped the blanket over him and crawled under it next to him.
The moments of passion had somehow subsided and she just laid next to Mark now. Mark felt tense and frustrated because he knew it was his fault that the pace of their making out had abruptly changed and basically stopped now. As Chiara had been rubbing herself against him his mind had started racing at how he was going to continue if he wouldn’t get an erection and couldn’t actually penetrate her. This was the first time he had been confronted with the reality of his disability when it came to the sexual aspects of things.
He now swallowed and looked at her next to him. She seemed distant and he was angry at himself.He shifted and looked over at her saying softly, “I’m so sorry Chiara.”
He felt the knot in his throat and he thought about what he wanted to say.
Chiara was laying silent next to him and he took a deep breath before he attempted again, “Chiara, I’m so sorry. I know I screwed it up. I just…I just…”
He stopped and swallowed again and he felt his heart hurt at her sudden distance, “Please come next to me, closer to me.”
He was relieved when she shifted her body toward him again and was now right next to him again where he could put his arm around her and pull her to him. She held herself up on her elbow and looked at him and he saw her eyes were glistening.
She hadn’t said anything and there were so many things he wanted to ask and say. He held her in his arms, she then laid her head on his chest and his fingers ran through her hair.With his arm around her he let his fingers run over her back, thinking of what to say. He felt his own emotions run out of control and he couldn’t understand.
“Chiara, please tell me how you feel about me? I don’t understand with the things you’ve said.”
His voice trembled and he could barely get out the words. He needed her to say something.
For a moment they lay quiet until Mark felt the tears from her eyes fall on his chest.“Chiara, are you all right?”
She didn’t look at him but only nodded with her head on his chest and sniffled her nose.
He tried to get a better view of her face and he saw the tears, “You’re crying? Why?”
He was worried that everything he had done had been wrong but she answered with a trembling voice, “You make me so happy Mark but it hurts so much.”
“Why does it hurt?”
Mark pulled her closer to him, he wanted to hold her so tight and he never wanted to let her go.Chiara then answered softly, “You’re the most amazing man I’ve ever been with.”
Mark didn’t really know how he could be so amazing when he basically just broke off a sexual interaction with a woman he cared so much about.
Softly he remarked, “I don’t know how I am amazing to you because I sure don’t feel like it after what I've just done or better what I've not done.”
“You haven’t done anything wrong.”
He tried to explain, “I panicked when you were so close to me and I screwed it up because of my insecurity.”
Chiara now moved and held herself up again looking at Mark, “With me you have nothing to be insecure about.”
Mark lowered his eyes, “What do mean with the things you said? Please just tell me. I need to know.”
She let her glistening eyes travel over his and she whisked some strands of his bangs out of his forehead.
“You mean so much to me Mark and please don’t ever forget that. You’re everything I’ve ever dreamed of. There has only been one other man in my life who made me feel like you do and he really wasn’t a man then. He was still a boy then and I was still a girl and he was my first love. I loved him so much and I loved him so much more after he had become paralyzed from injuries he had sustained from a car accident. And then I realized that the only men I can ever love will have to be just like him - paralyzed.”
Mark kept his gaze on her expectantly and she added, “It’s men like he was and a man like you are with legs not working and not being able to walk and just the way you are. You’ve been in my dreams for a long, long time Mark.”
Mark was somewhat stunned at her revelation once again, tying into exactly what she had said earlier. He couldn’t understand but he was intrigued and also nervous.
He asked softly, “What was his name?”Chiara answered with a soft smile thinking back, “His name was Aaron and my name was Madison then.”
Mark had so many questions, “Madison?”
“Yes, my name is Madison Chiara.”
“Is that why you named the stuffed animal Maddy.”
Chiara now laughed softly, “Yes.”
“How old were you?”
“I was sixteen, Aaron was almost seventeen. We were High School sweethearts.”
Mark was intrigued by everything she had revealed to him and he had so many more questions.
“Where is he now?”
“I don’t know. He broke up with me when he went off to college. I guess there were other girls who didn’t mind being with a boy in a wheelchair. I wasn’t the only one. We had been together for almost four years.”
Mark thought for a moment, trying to make sense of it all, “So you were with him when he…when he was in an accident?”
“Yes, we had been together for almost a year. I was with him the whole time from the time of the accident until he came home paralyzed.”
“Were you in the car?”
“Yes, I was in the car with him.”
Mark thought about this for a moment, then said, “It must have been traumatizing.”
“I held his hand when he cried and said he couldn’t feel his legs anymore. I could have gotten out of the car but I stayed with him until the EMT’s got there. He was pinned in the car and couldn’t move anymore.”
Mark bit his lips now and all he could say was, “Wow.”
Chiara’s tears were now slowly running over her face and Mark took a deep breath at her revelations but he had more questions.He wiped some tears away with his fingers, “So why…why is it that way? The paralysis…why is it that?”
She lowered her eyes, “I don’t know. I don’t know why and what it is.”
Mark wasn’t satisfied with the answer but he really didn’t know what else he could ask about this. He was stunned and tried to make sense of it all.
Her tears were still flowing as she said, “When your friends came out that night a couple of weeks ago and talked to me about hiring me for your birthday, they didn’t mention you were in a wheelchair. I had no idea until when I was at the bar that night, Trey got a text from them to look for the guy in the wheelchair and they told us your name was Mark.”Mark listened to Chiara gazing at her.
Chiara then added, “I almost backed out of it then because I didn’t know if it was a good idea what your friends had planned. And I didn’t know what kind of disability you had. They had not told me anything really. And then when I saw you my heart beat so fast and I was blown away. I couldn’t believe my eyes and really even if you would have accepted the services I don’t know if I could even have done it. The moment I saw you there in your wheelchair, you were not just any guy anymore, you were exactly who I had pictured in my dreams for such a long time. The moment I walked away from you that night at the bar my heart was hurting so bad and I wanted nothing more than to run back to you and get to know you and be with you but not in this way. I had no choice than to leave and I didn’t think I would ever see you again until you came out to the streets.”
Mark was overwhelmed with her confession but he wanted to hear it all so much and he shook his head in amazement at everything he heard now.He scanned her face and she let her eyes travel over his and he ran his fingers down through her hair. They were quiet for a few more moments as Mark processed what Chiara had revealed to him.
She then laid on his chest again and said softly, “I loved Aaron very much and I’ve never loved anyone else again until…until now.”Mark didn’t know what to say and all he could do is pull her closer to him in the face of the things she had told him.
He let his hands run over her head and he kissed her forehead.His mind was still racing at the moments with Chiara and he then said softly, “I think…”
He stopped and took a deep breath, then tried again, “I think I’m falling in love with you.”
Chiara was quiet and instead of answering, tears built up in her eyes again and she pressed her finger on his lips and Mark didn’t know what that meant.
Mark swallowed and they just laid together until he asked, “Will you stay with me?”It took a moment for Chiara to answer, “I will always stay with you and you will always stay with me in here.”
She took his hand and put it on her heart and on his heart and he didn’t understand.
There was something about the way she had said this that scared Mark very much. He swallowed and he pulled her closer again and with her head on his chest her tears were still flowing slowly.
Mark ran his hand over her hair and felt her breathe on him. Chiara thought about everything that had happened and how Mark was the first man in a long time that had not actually wanted her for sex. She was laying there with him and she glanced over his chest to the wheelchair by the side of the bed. She felt so much for Mark. Her fingers softly traced over his chest and arms and she felt so safe in his arms. In an ideal world she would always be with him but they were not in an ideal world and her heart was breaking thinking about this.
Soon after Mark realized how Chiara was taking soft even breaths and he saw she had fallen asleep on him. He was anything but tired but instead his mind was still spinning at the whole situation and the revelations of Chiara’s past and how she felt about the way he was.
It was difficult for him to comprehend how there was such a thing as she had described and he wondered how many women were like Chiara and he pondered if he had met any women like her since his being in the wheelchair.
He just couldn’t comprehend but his heart was overflowing with so many emotions now. He heard Chiara’s soft breathing on his chest and he made sure she was covered up. He laid there in the dimness of only the lights from the bathroom and hallway falling into his bedroom and he felt Chiara next to him and he wanted to do everything to make her happy and his fingers softly ran over her face as she was sleeping in his arms. Her warm skin and breast were next to his chest and she felt soft and small next to him. He wanted her with him forever.
Before he would fall asleep, he wanted to get into the bathroom once more. It was now midnight.He eventually gently pulled his arm out from under her head and she moaned softly but didn’t wake up and he managed to get into this TiLite and get into the bathroom.
After he was done cathing he washed his hands, cleaned up his face and brushed his teeth. He made sure Ranger was good on food and then he turned off all the lights and made his way back into his bedroom.
Chiara was still breathing softly sleeping on his bed. He transferred onto the bed as quietly as he could and he found a comfortable position. He had not put on any incontinence briefs, he didn’t want Chiara to see that. He was naked and hoped very much that cathing at midnight would take him over until in the early morning.
He couldn’t fall asleep; his mind was in overdrive at everything that had happened between Chiara and him, the things she had told him and how he still wasn’t sure about all of it.
At almost three in the morning when he was still lying awake next to her, he decided to take a sleeping pill. Chiara had not moved or done anything, she was fast asleep.
He downed the tablet with a sip of water and it finally helped rest his mind and he didn’t know when, but he eventually fell asleep.